These sentiments were more strongly impressed upon my mind than the words I made use of were capable of conveying an idea of.  This will appear more fully in my following letters.

As soon as we were returned from walking, the Queen my mother retired with me into her closet, and addressed the following words to me:  “Your brother has been relating the conversation you have had together; he considers you no longer as a child, neither shall I. It will be a great comfort to me to converse with you as I would with your brother.  For the future you will freely speak your mind, and have no apprehensions of taking too great a liberty, for it is what I wish.”  These words gave me a pleasure then which I am now unable to express.  I felt a satisfaction and a joy which nothing before had ever caused me to feel.  I now considered the pastimes of my childhood as vain amusements.  I shunned the society of my former companions of the same age.  I disliked dancing and hunting, which I thought beneath my attention.  I strictly complied with her agreeable injunction, and never missed being with her at her rising in the morning and going to rest at night.  She did me the honour, sometimes, to hold me in conversation for two and three hours at a time.  God was so gracious with me that I gave her great satisfaction; and she thought she could not sufficiently praise me to those ladies who were about her.  I spoke of my brother’s affairs to her, and he was constantly apprised by me of her sentiments and opinion; so that he had every reason to suppose I was firmly attached to his interest.

LETTER III.

Le Guast.—­His Character.—­Anjou Affects to Be Jealous of the Guises.—­Dissuades the Queen-mother from Reposing Confidence in Marguerite.—­She Loses the Favour of the Queen-mother and Falls Sick.—­Anjou’s Hypocrisy.—­He Introduces De Guise into Marguerite’s Sick Chamber.—­Marguerite Demanded in Marriage by the King of Portugal.—­Made Uneasy on That Account.—­Contrives to Relieve Herself.—­The Match with Portugal Broken off.

I continued to pass my time with the Queen my mother, greatly to my satisfaction, until after the battle of Moncontour.  By the same despatch that brought the news of this victory to the Court, my brother, who was ever desirous to be near the Queen my mother, wrote her word that he was about to lay siege to St. Jean d’Angely, and that it would be necessary that the King should be present whilst it was going on.

She, more anxious to see him than he could be to have her near him, hastened to set out on the journey, taking me with her, and her customary train of attendants.  I likewise experienced great joy upon the occasion, having no suspicion that any mischief awaited me.  I was still young and without experience, and I thought the happiness I enjoyed was always to continue; but the malice of Fortune prepared for me at this interview a reverse that I little expected, after the fidelity with which I had discharged the trust my brother had reposed in me.