Larry [impatiently].  Oh, rubbish!  What’s the good of the man that’s starved out of a farm murdering the man that’s starved into it?  Would you have done such a thing?

Broadbent.  Yes.  I—­I—­I—­I—­[stammering with fury] I should have shot the confounded landlord, and wrung the neck of the damned agent, and blown the farm up with dynamite, and Dublin Castle along with it.

Larry.  Oh yes:  you’d have done great things; and a fat lot of good you’d have got out of it, too!  That’s an Englishman all over! make bad laws and give away all the land, and then, when your economic incompetence produces its natural and inevitable results, get virtuously indignant and kill the people that carry out your laws.

Aunt Judy.  Sure never mind him, Mr Broadbent.  It doesn’t matter, anyhow, because there’s harly any landlords left; and ther’ll soon be none at all.

Larry.  On the contrary, ther’ll soon be nothing else; and the Lord help Ireland then!

Aunt Judy.  Ah, you’re never satisfied, Larry. [To Nora] Come on, alanna, an make the paste for the pie.  We can leave them to their talk.  They don’t want us [she takes up the tray and goes into the house].

Broadbent [rising and gallantly protesting] Oh, Miss Doyle!  Really, really—­

Nora, following Aunt Judy with the rolled-up cloth in her hands, looks at him and strikes him dumb.  He watches her until she disappears; then comes to Larry and addresses him with sudden intensity.

Broadbent.  Larry.

Larry.  What is it?

Broadbent.  I got drunk last night, and proposed to Miss Reilly.

Larry.  You hwat??? [He screams with laughter in the falsetto
Irish register unused for that purpose in England].

Broadbent.  What are you laughing at?

Larry [stopping dead].  I don’t know.  That’s the sort of thing an
Irishman laughs at.  Has she accepted you?

Broadbent.  I shall never forget that with the chivalry of her nation, though I was utterly at her mercy, she refused me.

Larry.  That was extremely improvident of her. [Beginning to reflect] But look here:  when were you drunk?  You were sober enough when you came back from the Round Tower with her.

Broadbent.  No, Larry, I was drunk, I am sorry to say.  I had two tumblers of punch.  She had to lead me home.  You must have noticed it.

Larry.  I did not.

Broadbent.  She did.

Larry.  May I ask how long it took you to come to business?  You can hardly have known her for more than a couple of hours.

Broadbent.  I am afraid it was hardly a couple of minutes.  She was not here when I arrived; and I saw her for the first time at the tower.

Larry.  Well, you are a nice infant to be let loose in this country!  Fancy the potcheen going to your head like that!