“At tibi nil faciam; sed Iota mentula lana.”
They had in the streets of Rome vessels and little tubs for passengers to urine in:
“Pusi
saepe lacum propter se, ac dolia curta.
Somno
devincti, credunt extollere vestem.”
["The little boys in
their sleep often think they are near the
public urinal, and raise
their coats to make use of it.”
—Lucretius,
iv.]
They had collation betwixt meals, and had in summer cellars of snow to cool their wine; and some there were who made use of snow in winter, not thinking their wine cool enough, even at that cold season of the year. The men of quality had their cupbearers and carvers, and their buffoons to make them sport. They had their meat served up in winter upon chafing dishes, which were set upon the table, and had portable kitchens (of which I myself have seen some) wherein all their service was carried about with them:
“Has
vobis epulas habete, lauti
Nos
offendimur ambulante caena.”
["Do you, if you please,
esteem these feasts: we do not like the
ambulatory suppers.”—Martial,
vii. 48, 4.]
In summer they had a contrivance to bring fresh and clear rills through their lower rooms, wherein were great store of living fish, which the guests took out with their own hands to be dressed every man according to his own liking. Fish has ever had this pre-eminence, and keeps it still, that the grandees, as to them, all pretend to be cooks; and indeed the taste is more delicate than that of flesh, at least to my fancy. But in all sorts of magnificence, debauchery, and voluptuous inventions of effeminacy and expense, we do, in truth, all we can to parallel them; for our wills are as corrupt as theirs: but we want ability to equal them. Our force is no more able to reach them in their vicious, than in their virtuous, qualities, for both the one and the other proceeded from a vigour of soul which was without comparison greater in them than in us; and souls, by how much the weaker they are, by so much have they less power to do either very well or very ill.