a respectful distance, but not so far off but that the ghost can distinctly hear a stage whisper.  The question put must be seriously meant, and it must be the question which the questioner would prefer to have answered above everything else at the time being.  Certain questions will be absolutely ruled out, such as, ‘Does Maria love me?’ or, ‘Has Reuben ever been engaged before?’ The laughter interrupted the speaker again, and Verrian hung his head in rage and shame; this stupid ass was spoiling the hope of anything beautiful in the spectacle and turning it into a gross burlesque.  Somehow he felt that the girl who had invented it had meant, in the last analysis, something serious, and it was in her behalf that he would have liked to choke Bushwick.  All the time he believed that Miss Macroyd, whose laugh sounded above the others, was somehow enjoying his indignation and divining its reason.

“Other questions, touching intemperance or divorce, the questioner will feel must not be asked; though it isn’t necessary to more than suggest this, I hope; it will be left entirely to the good taste and good feeling of the—­party.  We all know what the temptations of South Dakota and the rum fiend are, and that to err is human, and forgive divine.”  He paused, having failed to get a laugh, but got it by asking, confidentially, “Where was I?  Oh!”—­he caught himself up—­“I remember.  Those of you who are in the habit of seeing ghosts need not be told that a ghost never speaks first; and those who have never met an apparition before, but are in the habit of going to the theatre, will recall the fact that in W. Shakespeare’s beautiful play of ‘Hamlet’ the play could not have gone on after the first scene if Horatio had not spoken to the ghost of Hamlet’s father and taken the chances of being snubbed.  Here there are no chances of that kind; the chances are that you’ll wish the ghost had not been entreated:  I think that is the phrase.”

In the laugh that followed a girl on Miss Macroyd’s other hand audibly asked her, “Oh, isn’t he too funny?”

“Delicious!” Miss Macroyd agreed.  Verrian felt she said it to vex him.

“Now, there’s just one other point,” Bushwick resumed, “and then I have done.  Only one question can be allowed to each person, but if the questioner is a lady she can ask a question and a half, provided she is not satisfied with the answer.  In this case, however, she will only get half an answer.  Now I have done, and if my arguments have convinced any one within the sound of my voice that our ghost really means business, I shall feel fully repaid for the pains and expense of getting up these few impromptu remarks, to which I have endeavored to give a humorous character, in order that you may all laugh your laugh out, and no unseemly mirth may interrupt the subsequent proceedings.  We will now have a little music, and those who can recall my words will be allowed to sing them.”