for their money: and, consequently, content themselves
with giving them, at the cheapest rate, the common
run of education: that is, a school till eighteen;
the university till twenty; and a couple of years riding
post through the several towns of Europe; impatient
till their boobies come home to be married, and, as
they call it, settled. Of those who really love
their sons, few know how to do it. Some spoil
them by fondling them while they are young, and then
quarrel with them when they are grown up, for having
been spoiled; some love them like mothers, and attend
only to the bodily health and strength of the hopes
of their family, solemnize his birthday, and rejoice,
like the subjects of the Great Mogul, at the increase
of his bulk; while others, minding, as they think,
only essentials, take pains and pleasure to see in
their heir, all their favorite weaknesses and imperfections.
I hope and believe that I have kept clear of all of
these errors in the education which I have given you.
No weaknesses of my own have warped it, no parsimony
has starved it, no rigor has deformed it. Sound
and extensive learning was the foundation which I
meant to lay—I have laid it; but that alone,
I knew, would by no means be sufficient: the
ornamental, the showish, the pleasing superstructure
was to be begun. In that view, I threw you into
the great world, entirely your own master, at an age
when others either guzzle at the university, or are
sent abroad in servitude to some awkward, pedantic
Scotch governor. This was to put you in the way,
and the only way of acquiring those manners, that
address, and those graces, which exclusively distinguish
people of fashion; and without which all moral virtues,
and all acquired learning, are of no sort of use in
the courts and ‘le beau monde’: on
the contrary, I am not sure if they are not an hindrance.
They are feared and disliked in those places, as too
severe, if not smoothed and introduced by the graces;
but of these graces, of this necessary ‘beau
vernis’, it seems there are still ’quelque
couches qui manquent’. Now, pray let me
ask you, coolly and seriously, ’pourquoi ces
couches manquent-elles’? For you may as
easily take them, as you may wear more or less powder
in your hair, more or less lace upon your coat.
I can therefore account for your wanting them no other
way in the world, than from your not being yet convinced
of their full value. You have heard some English
bucks say, “Damn these finical outlandish airs,
give me a manly, resolute manner. They make a
rout with their graces, and talk like a parcel of
dancing-masters, and dress like a parcel of fops:
one good Englishman will beat three of them.”
But let your own observation undeceive you of these
prejudices. I will give you one instance only,
instead of an hundred that I could give you, of a very
shining fortune and figure, raised upon no other foundation
whatsoever, than that of address, manners, and graces.
Between you and me (for this example must go no further),