is very often the case with absent people), he does not know his most intimate acquaintance by sight, or answers them as if he were at cross purposes.  He leaves his hat in one room, his sword in another, and would leave his shoes in a third, if his buckles, though awry, did not save them:  his legs and arms, by his awkward management of them, seem to have undergone the question extraordinaire; and his head, always hanging upon one or other of his shoulders, seems to have received the first stroke upon a block.  I sincerely value and esteem him for his parts, learning, and virtue; but, for the soul of me, I cannot love him in company.  This will be universally the case, in common life, of every inattentive, awkward man, let his real merit and knowledge be ever so great.  When I was of your age, I desired to shine, as far as I was able, in every part of life; and was as attentive to my manners, my dress, and my air, in company of evenings, as to my books and my tutor in the mornings.  A young fellow should be ambitious to shine in everything—­and, of the two, always rather overdo than underdo.  These things are by no means trifles:  they are of infinite consequence to those who are to be thrown into the great world, and who would make a figure or a fortune in it.  It is not sufficient to deserve well; one must please well too.  Awkward, disagreeable merit will never carry anybody far.  Wherever you find a good dancing-master, pray let him put you upon your haunches; not so much for the sake of dancing, as for coming into a room, and presenting yourself genteelly and gracefully.  Women, whom you ought to endeavor to please, cannot forgive vulgar and awkward air and gestures; ’il leur faut du brillant’.  The generality of men are pretty like them, and are equally taken by the same exterior graces.

I am very glad that you have received the diamond buckles safe; all I desire in return for them is, that they may be buckled even upon your feet, and that your stockings may not hide them.  I should be sorry that you were an egregious fop; but, I protest, that of the two, I would rather have you a fop than a sloven.  I think negligence in my own dress, even at my age, when certainly I expect no advantages from my dress, would be indecent with regard to others.  I have done with fine clothes; but I will have my plain clothes fit me, and made like other people’s:  In the evenings, I recommend to you the company of women of fashion, who have a right to attention and will be paid it.  Their company will smooth your manners, and give you a habit of attention and respect, of which you will find the advantage among men.

My plan for you, from the beginning, has been to make you shine equally in the learned and in the polite world; the former part is almost completed to my wishes, and will, I am persuaded, in a little time more, be quite so.  The latter part is still in your power to complete; and I flatter myself that you will do it, or else the former part will avail you very little; especially in your department, where the exterior address and graces do half the business; they must be the harbingers of your merit, or your merit will be very coldly received; all can, and do judge of the former, few of the latter.