There are two sorts of good company; one, which is called the beau monde, and consists of the people who have the lead in courts, and in the gay parts of life; the other consists of those who are distinguished by some peculiar merit, or who excel in some particular and valuable art or science.  For my own part, I used to think myself in company as, much above me, when I was with Mr. Addison and Mr. Pope, as if I had been with all the princes in Europe.  What I mean by low company, which should by all means be avoided, is the company of those, who, absolutely insignificant and contemptible in themselves, think they are honored by being in your company; and who flatter every vice and every folly you have, in order to engage you to converse with them.  The pride of being the first of the company is but too common; but it is very silly, and very prejudicial.  Nothing in the world lets down a character quicker than that wrong turn.

You may possibly ask me, whether a man has it always in his power to get the best company? and how?  I say, Yes, he has, by deserving it; providing he is but in circumstances which enable him to appear upon the footing of a gentleman.  Merit and good-breeding will make their way everywhere.  Knowledge will introduce him, and good-breeding will endear him to the best companies:  for, as I have often told you, politeness and good-breeding are absolutely necessary to adorn any, or all other good qualities or talents.  Without them, no knowledge, no perfection whatever, is seen in its best light.  The scholar, without good-breeding, is a pedant; the philosopher, a cynic; the soldier, a brute; and every man disagreeable.

I long to hear, from my several correspondents at Leipsig, of your arrival there, and what impression you make on them at first; for I have Arguses, with an hundred eyes each, who will watch you narrowly, and relate to me faithfully.  My accounts will certainly be true; it depends upon you, entirely, of what kind they shall be.  Adieu.

LETTER XVII

London, October 16, O. S. 1747

Dear boy:  The art of pleasing is a very necessary one to possess; but a very difficult one to acquire.  It can hardly be reduced to rules; and your own good sense and observation will teach you more of it than I can.  Do as you would be done by, is the surest method that I know of pleasing.  Observe carefully what pleases you in others, and probably the same thing in you will please others.  If you are pleased with the complaisance and attention of others to your humors, your tastes, or your weaknesses, depend upon it the same complaisance and attention, on your part to theirs, will equally please them.  Take the tone of the company that you are in, and do not pretend to give it; be serious, gay, or even trifling, as you find the present humor of the company; this is an attention due from every individual to