THE STOLEN WHITE ELEPHANT

by Mark Twain

[Left out of A Tramp Abroad, because it was feared that some of the particulars had been exaggerated, and that others were not true.  Before these suspicions had been proven groundless, the book had gone to press.  —­M.  T.]

The following curious history was related to me by a chance railway acquaintance.  He was a gentleman more than seventy years of age, and his thoroughly good and gentle face and earnest and sincere manner imprinted the unmistakable stamp of truth upon every statement which fell from his lips.  He said: 

You know in what reverence the royal white elephant of Siam is held by the people of that country.  You know it is sacred to kings, only kings may possess it, and that it is, indeed, in a measure even superior to kings, since it receives not merely honor but worship.  Very well; five years ago, when the troubles concerning the frontier line arose between Great Britain and Siam, it was presently manifest that Siam had been in the wrong.  Therefore every reparation was quickly made, and the British representative stated that he was satisfied and the past should be forgotten.  This greatly relieved the King of Siam, and partly as a token of gratitude, partly also, perhaps, to wipe out any little remaining vestige of unpleasantness which England might feel toward him, he wished to send the Queen a present—­the sole sure way of propitiating an enemy, according to Oriental ideas.  This present ought not only to be a royal one, but transcendently royal.  Wherefore, what offering could be so meet as that of a white elephant?  My position in the Indian civil service was such that I was deemed peculiarly worthy of the honor of conveying the present to her Majesty.  A ship was fitted out for me and my servants and the officers and attendants of the elephant, and in due time I arrived in New York harbor and placed my royal charge in admirable quarters in Jersey City.  It was necessary to remain awhile in order to recruit the animal’s health before resuming the voyage.

All went well during a fortnight—­then my calamities began.  The white elephant was stolen!  I was called up at dead of night and informed of this fearful misfortune.  For some moments I was beside myself with terror and anxiety; I was helpless.  Then I grew calmer and collected my faculties.  I soon saw my course—­for, indeed, there was but the one course for an intelligent man to pursue.  Late as it was, I flew to New York and got a policeman to conduct me to the headquarters of the detective force.  Fortunately I arrived in time, though the chief of the force, the celebrated Inspector Blunt was just on the point of leaving for his home.  He was a man of middle size and compact frame, and when he was thinking deeply he had a way of kniting his brows and tapping his forehead reflectively with his finger, which impressed you at once with the conviction that you stood in the presence of a person of no common order.  The very sight of him gave me confidence and made me hopeful.  I stated my errand.  It did not flurry him in the least; it had no more visible effect upon his iron self-possession than if I had told him somebody had stolen my dog.  He motioned me to a seat, and said, calmly: