“How I have wept whole nights-thinking of those poor women of former days, so beautiful, so loving, so sweet, whose arms were extended in an embrace, and who now are dead!  A kiss is immortal!  It goes from lips to lips, from century to century, from age to age.  Men receive them, give them and die.

“The past attracts me, the present terrifies me because the future means death.  I regret all that has gone by.  I mourn all who have lived; I should like to check time, to stop the clock.  But time goes, it goes, it passes, it takes from me each second a little of myself for the annihilation of to-morrow.  And I shall never live again.

“Farewell, ye women of yesterday.  I love you!

“But I am not to be pitied.  I found her, the one I was waiting for, and through her I enjoyed inestimable pleasure.

“I was sauntering in Paris on a bright, sunny morning, with a happy heart and a high step, looking in at the shop windows with the vague interest of an idler.  All at once I noticed in the shop of a dealer in antiques a piece of Italian furniture of the seventeenth century.  It was very handsome, very rare.  I set it down as being the work of a Venetian artist named Vitelli, who was celebrated in his day.

“I went on my way.

“Why did the remembrance of that piece of furniture haunt me with such insistence that I retraced my steps?  I again stopped before the shop, in order to take another look at it, and I felt that it tempted me.

“What a singular thing temptation is!  One gazes at an object, and, little by little, it charms you, it disturbs you, it fills your thoughts as a woman’s face might do.  The enchantment of it penetrates your being, a strange enchantment of form, color and appearance of an inanimate object.  And one loves it, one desires it, one wishes to have it.  A longing to own it takes possession of you, gently at first, as though it were timid, but growing, becoming intense, irresistible.

“And the dealers seem to guess, from your ardent gaze, your secret and increasing longing.

“I bought this piece of furniture and had it sent home at once.  I placed it in my room.

“Oh, I am sorry for those who do not know the honeymoon of the collector with the antique he has just purchased.  One looks at it tenderly and passes one’s hand over it as if it were human flesh; one comes back to it every moment, one is always thinking of it, wherever ore goes, whatever one does.  The dear recollection of it pursues you in the street, in society, everywhere; and when you return home at night, before taking off your gloves or your hat; you go and look at it with the tenderness of a lover.

“Truly, for eight days I worshipped this piece of furniture.  I opened its doors and pulled out the drawers every few moments.  I handled it with rapture, with all the intense joy of possession.

“But one evening I surmised, while I was feeling the thickness of one of the panels, that there must be a secret drawer in it:  My heart began to beat, and I spent the night trying to discover this secret cavity.