“And these are your grounds for a suspicion of which you should be ashamed, if you are a good Christian.”

“God save me from thinking evil of my neighbour, but I have been informed that your laughter and your jests are of such a nature as to be offensive to people of morality.”

“Then it is my neighbour the abbe who has been foolish enough to give you this information?”

“I cannot tell you how I heard it, but I have heard it.”

“Very good.  To-morrow I shall seek another lodging, so as to afford your tender conscience some relief.”

“Can’t I attend on you as well as my daughter?”

“No; your daughter makes me laugh, and laughing is beneficial to me, whereas you would not make me laugh at all.  You have insulted me, and I leave your house to-morrow.”

“I shall have to tell my husband the reason of your departure, and I do not want to do that.”

“You can do as you like; that’s no business of mine.  Go away; I want to get into bed.”

“Allow me to wait on you.”

“Certainly not; if you want anybody to wait on me, send Margarita.”

“She’s asleep.”

“Then wake her up.”

The good woman went her way, and two minutes later, the girl came in with little on but her chemise.  She had not had time to put in her false eye, and her expression was so amusing that I went off into a roar of laughter.

“I was sleeping soundly,” she began, “and my mother woke me up all of a sudden, and told me to come and wait on you, or else you would leave, and my father would think we had been in mischief.”

“I will stay, if you will continue to wait on me.”

“I should like to come very much, but we mustn’t laugh any more, as the abbe has complained of us.”

“Oh! it is the abbe, is it?”

“Of course it is.  Our jests and laughter irritate his passions.”

“The rascal!  We will punish him rarely.  If we laughed last night, we will laugh ten times louder tonight.”

Thereupon we began a thousand tricks, accompanied by shouts and shrieks of laughter, purposely calculated to drive the little priest desperate.  When the fun was at its height, the door opened and the mother came in.

I had Margarita’s night-cap on my head, and Margarita’s face was adorned with two huge moustaches, which I had stuck on with ink.  Her mother had probably anticipated taking us in the fact, but when she came in she was obliged to re-echo our shouts of mirth.

“Come now,” said I, “do you think our amusements criminal?”

“Not a bit; but you see your innocent orgies keep your neighbour awake.”

“Then he had better go and sleep somewhere else; I am not going to put myself out for him.  I will even say that you must choose between him and me; if I consent to stay with you, you must send him away, and I will take his room.”

“I can’t send him away before the end of the month, and I am afraid he will say things to my husband which will disturb the peace of the house.”