Lord W. [Dubious] What d’you mean by Christianity—­loving—­kindness and that?  Of course I think that dogma’s got the knock.

     [He walks.]

Press. [Writing] “Lord William thought dogma had got the knock.”  I should like you just to develop your definition of Christianity.  “Loving—­kindness” strikes rather a new note.

Lord W. New?  What about the Sermon on the Mount?

Press. [Writing] “Refers to Sermon on Mount.”  I take it you don’t belong to any Church, Lord William?

Lord W. [Exasperated] Well, really—­I’ve been baptised and that sort of thing.  But look here——­

Press.  Oh! you can trust me—­I shan’t say anything that you’ll regret.  Now, do you consider that a religious revival would help to quiet the country?

Lord W. Well, I think it would be a deuced, good thing if everybody were a bit more kind.

Press.  Ah! [Musing] I feel that your views are strikingly original, Lord William.  If you could just open out on them a little more?  How far would you apply kindness in practice?

Lord W. Can you apply it in theory?

Press.  I believe it is done.  But would you allow yourself to be blown up with impunity?

Lord W. Well, that’s a bit extreme.  But I quite sympathise with this chap.  Imagine yourself in his shoes.  He sees a huge house, all these bottles; us swilling them down; perhaps he’s got a starving wife, or consumptive kids.

Press. [Writing and murmuring] Um-m!  “Kids.”

Lord W. He thinks:  “But for the grace of God, there swill I. Why should that blighter have everything and I nothing?” and all that.

Press. [Writing] “And all that.” [Eagerly] Yes?

Lord W. And gradually—­you see—­this contrast—­becomes an obsession with him.  “There’s got to be an example made,” he thinks; and—­er—­ he makes it, don’t you know?

Press. [Writing] Ye-es?  And—­when you’re the example?

Lord W. Well, you feel a bit blue, of course.  But my point is that you quite see it.

Press.  From the other world.  Do you believe in a future life, Lord William?  The public took a lot of interest in the question, if you remember, at the time of the war.  It might revive at any moment, if there’s to be a revolution.

Lord W. The wish is always father to the thought, isn’t it?

Press.  Yes!  But—­er—­doesn’t the question of a future life rather bear on your point about kindness?  If there isn’t one—­why be kind?

Lord W. Well, I should say one oughtn’t to be kind for any motive—­ that’s self-interest; but just because one feels it, don’t you know.

Press. [Writing vigorously] That’s very new—­very new!

Lord W. [Simply] You chaps are wonderful.