“Never having done much in the gunning line (since when a hinnasent boy, me and Jim Cox used to go out at Healing, and shoot sparrers in the Edges with a pistle)—­I was reyther dowtfle as to my suxes as a shot, and practusd for some days at a stoughd bird in a shooting gallery, which a chap histed up and down with a string.  I sugseaded in itting the hannimle pretty well.  I bought Awker’s ‘Shooting-Guide,’ two double-guns at Mantings, and salected from the French prints of fashn the most gawjus and ellygant sportting ebillyment.  A lite blue velvet and goold cap, woar very much on one hear, a cravatt of yaller & green imbroidered satting, a weskit of the McGrigger plaid, & a jacket of the McWhirter tartn, (with large, motherapurl butns, engraved with coaches & osses, and sporting subjix,) high leather gayters, and marocky shooting shoes, was the simple hellymence of my costewm, and I flatter myself set hoff my figger in rayther a fayverable way.  I took down none of my own pusnal istablishmint except Fitzwarren, my hone mann, and my grooms, with Desparation and my curricle osses, and the Fourgong containing my dressing-case and close.

“I was heverywhere introjuiced in the county as the great Railroad Cappitlist, who was to make Diddlesex the most prawsperous districk of the hempire.  The squires prest forrards to welcome the new comer amongst ’em; and we had a Hagricultural Meating of the Bareacres tenantry, where I made a speech droring tears from heavery i.  It was in compliment to a layborer who had brought up sixteen children, and lived sixty years on the istate on seven bobb a week.  I am not prowd, though I know my station.  I shook hands with that mann in lavinder kidd gloves.  I told him that the purshuit of hagriculture wos the noblist hockupations of humannaty:  I spoke of the yoming of Hengland, who (under the command of my hancisters) had conquered at Hadjincourt & Cressy; and I gave him a pair of new velveteen inagspressables, with two and six in each pocket, as a reward for three score years of labor.  Fitzwarren, my man, brought them forrards on a satting cushing.  Has I sat down defning chears selewted the horator; the band struck up ’The Good Old English Gentleman.’  I looked to the ladies galry; my Hangelina waived her ankasher and kissd her &; and I sor in the distans that pore Mary Hann efected evidently to tears by my ellaquints.”

“What an adwance that gal has made since she’s been in Lady Hangelina’s company!  Sins she wears her young lady’s igsploded gownds and retired caps and ribbings, there’s an ellygance abowt her which is puffickly admarable; and which, haddid to her own natral bewty & sweetniss, creates in my boozum serting sensatiums . . .  Shor!  I mustn’t give way to fealinx unwuthy of a member of the aristoxy.  What can she be to me but a mear recklection—­a vishn of former ears?

“I’m blest if I didn mistake her for Hangelina herself yesterday.  I met her in the grand Collydore of Bareacres Castle.  I sor a lady in a melumcolly hattatude gacing outawinder at the setting sun, which was eluminating the fair parx and gardings of the ancient demean.