Burlesques eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 581 pages of information about Burlesques.

Burlesques eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 581 pages of information about Burlesques.

On the 29th of March in the year 1199, the good King, having copiously partaken of breakfast, caused his trumpets to blow, and advanced with his host upon the breach of the castle of Chalus.  Arthur de Pendennis bore his banner; Wilfrid of Ivanhoe fought on the King’s right hand.  Molyneux, Bishop of Bullocksmithy, doffed crosier and mitre for that day, and though fat and pursy, panted up the breach with the most resolute spirit, roaring out war-cries and curses, and wielding a prodigious mace of iron, with which he did good execution.  Roger de Backbite was forced to come in attendance upon the sovereign, but took care to keep in the rear of his august master, and to shelter behind his huge triangular shield as much as possible.  Many lords of note followed the King and bore the ladders; and as they were placed against the wall, the air was perfectly dark with the shower of arrows which the French archers poured out at the besiegers, and the cataract of stones, kettles, bootjacks, chests of drawers, crockery, umbrellas, congreve-rockets, bombshells, bolts and arrows and other missiles which the desperate garrison flung out on the storming-party.  The King received a copper coal-scuttle right over his eyes, and a mahogany wardrobe was discharged at his morion, which would have felled an ox, and would have done for the King had not Ivanhoe warded it off skilfully.  Still they advanced, the warriors falling around them like grass beneath the scythe of the mower.

The ladders were placed in spite of the hail of death raining round:  the King and Ivanhoe were, of course, the first to mount them.  Chalus stood in the breach, borrowing strength from despair; and roaring out, “Ha!  Plantagenet, St. Barbacue for Chalus!” he dealt the King a crack across the helmet with his battle-axe, which shore off the gilt lion and crown that surmounted the steel cap.  The King bent and reeled back; the besiegers were dismayed; the garrison and the Count of Chalus set up a shout of triumph:  but it was premature.

As quick as thought Ivanhoe was into the Count with a thrust in tierce, which took him just at the joint of the armor, and ran him through as clean as a spit does a partridge.  Uttering a horrid shriek, he fell back writhing; the King recovering staggered up the parapet; the rush of knights followed, and the union-jack was planted triumphantly on the walls, just as Ivanhoe,—­but we must leave him for a moment.

“Ha, St. Richard!—­ha, St. George!” the tremendous voice of the Lion-king was heard over the loudest roar of the onset.  At every sweep of his blade a severed head flew over the parapet, a spouting trunk tumbled, bleeding, on the flags of the bartizan.  The world hath never seen a warrior equal to that Lion-hearted Plantagenet, as he raged over the keep, his eyes flashing fire through the bars of his morion, snorting and chafing with the hot lust of battle.  One by one les enfans de Chalus had fallen; there was only one left at last of all the

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Burlesques from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.