to the dungeons they have made for themselves.
You know the expression: ’She has made her
bed, she must lie on it!’ It is a hard-mouthed
saying, quite unworthy of a gentleman or lady in the
best sense of those words; and I can use no stronger
condemnation. I have not been what is called
a moral man, but I wish to use no words to you, my
dear, which will make you think lightly of ties or
contracts into which you enter. Heaven forbid!
But with the experience of a life behind me I do
say that those who condemn the victims of these tragic
mistakes, condemn them and hold out no hands to help
them, are inhuman, or rather they would be if they
had the understanding to know what they are doing.
But they haven’t! Let them go!
They are as much anathema to me as I, no doubt, am
to them. I have had to say all this, because
I am going to put you into a position to judge your
mother, and you are very young, without experience
of what life is. To go on with the story.
After three years of effort to subdue her shrinking—I
was going to say her loathing and it’s not too
strong a word, for shrinking soon becomes loathing
under such circumstances—three years of
what to a sensitive, beauty-loving nature like your
mother’s, Jon, was torment, she met a young
man who fell in love with her. He was the architect
of this very house that we live in now, he was building
it for her and Fleur’s father to live in, a
new prison to hold her, in place of the one she inhabited
with him in London. Perhaps that fact played
some part in what came of it. But in any case
she, too, fell in love with him. I know it’s
not necessary to explain to you that one does not
precisely choose with whom one will fall in love.
It comes. Very well! It came. I can
imagine—though she never said much to me
about it—the struggle that then took place
in her, because, Jon, she was brought up strictly
and was not light in her ideas—not at all.
However, this was an overwhelming feeling, and it
came to pass that they loved in deed as well as in
thought. Then came a fearful tragedy. I
must tell you of it because if I don’t you will
never understand the real situation that you have
now to face. The man whom she had married—Soames
Forsyte, the father of Fleur one night, at the height
of her passion for this young man, forcibly reasserted
his rights over her. The next day she met her
lover and told him of it. Whether he committed
suicide or whether he was accidentally run over in
his distraction, we never knew; but so it was.
Think of your mother as she was that evening when she
heard of his death. I happened to see her.
Your grandfather sent me to help her if I could.
I only just saw her, before the door was shut against
me by her husband. But I have never forgotten
her face, I can see it now. I was not in love
with her then, not for twelve years after, but I have
never for gotten. My dear boy—it is
not easy to write like this. But you see, I must.
Your mother is wrapped up in you, utterly, devotedly.