March 24.

I have tendered my resignation to the court.  I hope it will be accepted, and you will forgive me for not having previously consulted you.  It is necessary I should leave this place.  I know all you will urge me to stay, and therefore I beg you will soften this news to my mother.  I am unable to do anything for myself:  how, then, should I be competent to assist others?  It will afflict her that I should have interrupted that career which would have made me first a privy councillor, and then minister, and that I should look behind me, in place of advancing.  Argue as you will, combine all the reasons which should have induced me to remain, I am going:  that is sufficient.  But, that you may not be ignorant of my destination, I may mention that the Prince of —­ is here.  He is much pleased with my company; and, having heard of my intention to resign, he has invited me to his country house, to pass the spring months with him.  I shall be left completely my own master; and, as we agree on all subjects but one, I shall try my fortune, and accompany him.

April l9.

Thanks for both your letters.  I delayed my reply, and withheld this letter, till I should obtain an answer from the court.  I feared my mother might apply to the minister to defeat my purpose.  But my request is granted, my resignation is accepted.  I shall not recount with what reluctance it was accorded, nor relate what the minister has written:  you would only renew your lamentations.  The crown prince has sent me a present of five and twenty ducats; and, indeed, such goodness has affected me to tears.  For this reason I shall not require from my mother the money for which I lately applied.

May 5.

I leave this place to-morrow; and, as my native place is only six miles from the high road, I intend to visit it once more, and recall the happy dreams of my childhood.  I shall enter at the same gate through which I came with my mother, when, after my father’s death, she left that delightful retreat to immure herself in your melancholy town.  Adieu, my dear friend:  you shall hear of my future career.

May 9.

I have paid my visit to my native place with all the devotion of a pilgrim, and have experienced many unexpected emotions.  Near the great elm tree, which is a quarter of a league from the village, I got out of the carriage, and sent it on before, that alone, and on foot, I might enjoy vividly and heartily all the pleasure of my recollections.  I stood there under that same elm which was formerly the term and object of my walks.  How things have since changed!  Then, in happy ignorance, I sighed for a world I did not know, where I hoped to find every pleasure and enjoyment which my heart could desire; and now, on my return from that wide world, O my friend, how many disappointed hopes and unsuccessful plans have I brought back!