the summit of a hill.  He has never viewed from any steeple the glories of a metropolis.  Heat has been his mortal enemy.  In the dog-days his days have been the days of a dog.  Therein, he has dreamed of flames and suffocation —­ of mountains upon mountains —­ of Pelion upon Ossa.  He was short of breath —­ to say all in a word, he was short of breath.  He thought it extravagant to play upon wind instruments.  He was the inventor of self-moving fans, wind-sails, and ventilators.  He patronized Du Pont the bellows-maker, and he died miserably in attempting to smoke a cigar.  His was a case in which I feel a deep interest —­ a lot in which I sincerely sympathize.

“But here,” —­ said I —­ “here” —­ and I dragged spitefully from its receptacle a gaunt, tall and peculiar-looking form, whose remarkable appearance struck me with a sense of unwelcome familiarity —­ “here is a wretch entitled to no earthly commiseration.”  Thus saying, in order to obtain a more distinct view of my subject, I applied my thumb and forefinger to its nose, and causing it to assume a sitting position upon the ground, held it thus, at the length of my arm, while I continued my soliloquy.

-"Entitled,” I repeated, “to no earthly commiseration.  Who indeed would think of compassioning a shadow?  Besides, has he not had his full share of the blessings of mortality?  He was the originator of tall monuments —­ shot-towers —­ lightning-rods —­ Lombardy poplars.  His treatise upon “Shades and Shadows” has immortalized him.  He edited with distinguished ability the last edition of “South on the Bones.”  He went early to college and studied pneumatics.  He then came home, talked eternally, and played upon the French-horn.  He patronized the bagpipes.  Captain Barclay, who walked against Time, would not walk against him.  Windham and Allbreath were his favorite writers, —­ his favorite artist, Phiz.  He died gloriously while inhaling gas —­ levique flatu corrupitur, like the fama pudicitae in Hieronymus. {*1} He was indubitably a”—­

“How can you? —­ how —­ can —­ you?” —­ interrupted the object of my animadversions, gasping for breath, and tearing off, with a desperate exertion, the bandage around its jaws —­ “how can you, Mr. Lackobreath, be so infernally cruel as to pinch me in that manner by the nose?  Did you not see how they had fastened up my mouth —­ and you must know —­ if you know any thing —­ how vast a superfluity of breath I have to dispose of!  If you do not know, however, sit down and you shall see.  In my situation it is really a great relief to be able to open ones mouth —­ to be able to expatiate —­ to be able to communicate with a person like yourself, who do not think yourself called upon at every period to interrupt the thread of a gentleman’s discourse.  Interruptions are annoying and should undoubtedly be abolished —­ don’t you think so? —­ no reply, I beg you, —­ one person is enough to be speaking at a time. —­ I shall be done by and by, and then you may begin. —­ How