“Thanks, dad.  But was that all?”

“All.”

“All that she was going to speak to me about?  Sure there was nothing else?”

“She didn’t say anything about anything else.”

“Then she doesn’t know!  Fine!”

Mr. Crocker’s feet came down from the mantelpiece with a crash.

“Jimmy!  You haven’t been raising Cain again?”

“No, no, dad.  Nothing serious.  High-spirited Young Patrician stuff, the sort of thing that’s expected of a fellow in my position.”

Mr. Crocker was not to be comforted.

“Jimmy, you’ve got to pull up.  Honest, you have.  I don’t care for myself.  I like to see a boy having a good time.  But your stepmother says you’re apt to queer us with the people up top, the way you’re going on.  Lord knows I wouldn’t care if things were different, but I’ll tell you exactly how I stand.  I didn’t get wise till this morning.  Your stepmother sprang it on me suddenly.  I’ve often wondered what all this stuff was about, this living in London and trailing the swells.  I couldn’t think what was your stepmother’s idea.  Now I know.  Jimmy, she’s trying to get them to make me a peer!”

“What!”

“Just that.  And she says—­”

“But, dad, this is rich!  This is comedy of a high order!  A peer!  Good Heavens, if it comes off, what shall I be?  This title business is all so complicated.  I know I should have to change my name to Hon. Rollo Cholmondeley or the Hon. Aubrey Marjoribanks, but what I want to know is which?  I want to be prepared for the worst.”

“And you see, Jimmy, these people up top, the guys who arrange the giving of titles, are keeping an eye on you, because you would have the title after me and naturally they don’t want to get stung.  I gathered all that from your stepmother.  Say, Jimmy, I’m not asking a lot of you, but there is just one thing you can do for me without putting yourself out too much.”

“I’ll do it, dad, if it kills me.  Slip me the info!”

“Your stepmother’s friend Lady Corstorphine’s nephew . . .”

“It’s not the sort of story to ask a man with a headache to follow.  I hope it gets simpler as it goes along.”

“Your stepmother wants you to be a good fellow and make friends with this boy.  You see, his father is in right with the Premier and has the biggest kind of a pull when it comes to handing out titles.”

“Is that all you want?  Leave it to me.  Inside of a week I’ll be playing kiss-in-the-ring with him.  The whole force of my sunny personality shall be directed towards making him love me.  What’s his name?”

“Lord Percy Whipple.”

Jimmy’s pipe fell with a clatter.

“Dad, pull yourself together!  Reflect!  You know you don’t seriously mean Lord Percy Whipple.”

“Eh?”

Jimmy laid a soothing hand on his father’s shoulder.