life long.  It gave her infinite pain to face Miles Errington, yet while at one moment she longed to fly from him, the next she felt an extraordinary desire to hear him speak, to learn the prevailing tone of his mind, to know his opinions.  There was an earnestness in his look and manner that appealed to her sympathies.  He was a just, upright gentleman.  What would he think of the dastardly deed by which she had robbed him?

“I must not think of it.  I must try and forget I ever did it, and be as good and true as I can in all else.  And the will!  I must destroy it.  I am sure my poor old uncle meant to do away with it.  Perhaps if it were clean gone I might feel more at rest.  How strange it is that instead of growing accustomed to the contemplation of my own dishonesty I become more keenly alive to the shame of my act as time rolls on!  Perhaps if I am brave and resolute I may conquer the scorpion stings of self-reproach.  How dear those two sweet peaceful years have cost me!  Would I undo it all to save myself these pangs?  No.  Then I suppose to bear is to conquer one’s fate.”

CHAPTER XV.

CROSS PURPOSES.

The first ten days at Castleford would have been dull indeed to Katherine but for the society of Cis and Charlie in the mornings, and the interest she took in watching Errington (who was of course a frequent visitor) in the evenings.

Though she avoided conversing with him as much as possible, he was a constant study to her.  He was different from all the men she had previously met.  She often wondered if anything could disturb him or hurry him.  Had he ever climbed trees and torn his clothes, or thrashed an adversary?  Had he any weaknesses, or vivid joys, or passionate longings?  Yet he did not seem a prig.  His manner, though dignified, was easy and natural; his eyes, though steady and penetrating, were kindly; his bearing had the repose of strength.  It was too awful to contemplate what his estimate of herself would be if he knew; but then he must never know!

As it was, he seemed inclined to be friendly and communicative, pleased when he met her strolling in the garden with Lady Alice, and gratified to find that she could accompany his fiancee’s songs.  Indeed he said he had never heard Lady Alice sing so well as when Miss Liddell played for her.

Apart from the boys and Errington, Katherine found time hang very heavily on her hands.  The aimless lingering over useless fancy-work or second-rate novels, the discussion of such gossip as their correspondence supplied, by means of which Mrs. Ormonde and Lady Alice got through the day, were infinitely wearisome to her.