“That’s so,” his partner declared. “We knew you wouldn’t be satisfied, anyway, Florence. Didn’t we, Henry?”
“I should say we did!”
“Yes, sir!” said Herbert. “Right when we were havin’ the worst time tryin’ to print it and make out some o’ the words, I said right then we were just throwing away our time. I said, ’What’s the use? That ole girl’s bound to raise Cain anyhow, so what’s the use wastin’ a whole lot of our good time and brains like this, just to suit her? Whatever we do, she’s certain to come over and insult us.’ Isn’t that what I said, Henry?”
“Yes, it is; and I said then you were right, and you are right!”
“Cert’nly I am,” said Herbert. “Didn’t I tell you she’d be just the way some the family say she is? A good many of ’em say she’d find fault with the undertaker at her own funeral. That’s just exactly what I said!”
“Oh, you did?” Florence burlesqued a polite interest. “How virry considerate of you! Then, perhaps you’ll try to be a gentleman enough for one simple moment to allow me to tell you my last remarks on this subject. I’ve said enough——”
“Oh, have you?” Herbert interrupted with violent sarcasm. “Oh, no! Say not so! Florence, say not so!”
At this, Henry Rooter loudly shouted with applausive hilarity; whereupon Herbert, rather surprised at his own effectiveness, naturally repeated his waggery.
“Say not so, Florence! Say not so! Say not so!”
“I’ll tell you one thing!” his lady cousin cried, thoroughly infuriated. “I wish to make just one last simple remark that I would care to soil myself with in your respects, Mister Herbert Illingsworth Atwater and Mister Henry Rooter!”
“Oh, say not so, Florence!” they both entreated. “Say not so! Say not so!”
“I’ll just simply state the simple truth,” Florence announced. “In the first place, you’re goin’ to live to see the day when you’ll come and beg me on your bented knees to have me put poems or anything I want to in your ole newspaper, but I’ll just laugh at you! ‘Indeed?’ I’ll say! ‘So you come beggin’ around me, do you? Ha, ha!’ I’ll say! ’I guess it’s a little too late for that! Why, I wouldn’t——’”
“Oh, say not so, Florence! Say not so!”
“‘Me to allow you to have one of my poems?’ I’ll say, ’Much less than that!’ I’ll say, ’because even if I was wearing the oldest shoes I got in the world I wouldn’t take the trouble to——’”
Her conclusion was drowned out. “Oh, Florence, say not so! Say not so, Florence! Say not so!”