repose peculiar to convalescence, Evadne gave herself
up to rapturous gratitude and love. But reflection
returned with health. She questioned him with
regard to the motives which had occasioned his critical
absence. She framed her enquiries with Greek
subtlety; she formed her conclusions with the decision
and firmness peculiar to her disposition. She
could not divine, that the breach which she had occasioned
between Raymond and Perdita was already irreparable:
but she knew, that under the present system it would
be widened each day, and that its result must be to
destroy her lover’s happiness, and to implant
the fangs of remorse in his heart. From the moment
that she perceived the right line of conduct, she
resolved to adopt it, and to part from Raymond for
ever. Conflicting passions, long-cherished love,
and self-inflicted disappointment, made her regard
death alone as sufficient refuge for her woe.
But the same feelings and opinions which had before
restrained her, acted with redoubled force; for she
knew that the reflection that he had occasioned her
death, would pursue Raymond through life, poisoning
every enjoyment, clouding every prospect. Besides,
though the violence of her anguish made life hateful,
it had not yet produced that monotonous, lethargic
sense of changeless misery which for the most part
produces suicide. Her energy of character induced
her still to combat with the ills of life; even those
attendant on hopeless love presented themselves, rather
in the shape of an adversary to be overcome, than of
a victor to whom she must submit. Besides, she
had memories of past tenderness to cherish, smiles,
words, and even tears, to con over, which, though remembered
in desertion and sorrow, were to be preferred to the
forgetfulness of the grave. It was impossible
to guess at the whole of her plan. Her letter
to Raymond gave no clue for discovery; it assured
him, that she was in no danger of wanting the means
of life; she promised in it to preserve herself, and
some future day perhaps to present herself to him in
a station not unworthy of her. She then bade
him, with the eloquence of despair and of unalterable
love, a last farewell.
All these circumstances were now related to Adrian
and Idris. Raymond then lamented the cureless
evil of his situation with Perdita. He declared,
notwithstanding her harshness, he even called it coldness,
that he loved her. He had been ready once with
the humility of a penitent, and the duty of a vassal,
to surrender himself to her; giving up his very soul
to her tutelage, to become her pupil, her slave, her
bondsman. She had rejected these advances; and
the time for such exuberant submission, which must
be founded on love and nourished by it, was now passed.
Still all his wishes and endeavours were directed
towards her peace, and his chief discomfort arose
from the perception that he exerted himself in vain.
If she were to continue inflexible in the line of
conduct she now pursued, they must part. The