“Why, lass, it isn’t oft tha oppens thi maath for nowt, tha generally lets summat aght.”

“Well, an’ when tha oppens thine, tha generally lets summat in, soa we’re abaght straight.”

“Aw wish we wor, lass, for aw’m stoled o’ this bother, an’ if ther isn’t a mule i’th’ garden nah, ther’s summat else, for if that isn’t Slinger, aw wor niver soa capt i’ my life.  Why, he looks as fat as a pig.  Oppen th’ door, an’ ax him in, for it’s th’ first time aw’ve seen him sin he’d his heead in a pooltice.”

“Gooid day, Slinger; ha ta gettin on?”

“Oh, meeterly just.  Aw thowt a callin when aw went past afoor, but ther wor sich a din, aw thowt ther mud be a mule i’ th’”—­

“What does ta say,” says Molly.  “Has ta come here to taunt me?  “Aw’ve been tell’d abaght that mule afoor this afternooin.”

“Molly,” said Jim, “tha caps me.  Doesn’t ta know what folk mean when they say there’s a mule i’ th’ garden?  They mean there’s a bit of a dust i’ th’ hoil, that’s all mun.”

“Oh! is that it!” says Molly.  “Aw see nah.  Yo know aw’m to be excused if aw dooant understand iverything, for aw’m not mich of a scholard; ther worn’t schooils like there is nah when aw wor a lass; but aw’d a brother once ’at wor as cliver as onybody—­he used to be able to rule th’ planets; but he wor draaned at last, an’ aw declare aw’ve niver been able to bide th’ seet o’ watter sin’.  Aw believe that wor what made me start o’ brewin.”

“Why yo happen have a sup left, said Slinger?”

“Ea lad, ther’s some i’ that pewter sithee—­tak howd an sup.”

“Thank thi’ “he said, an’ here’s wishing at ther may niver be a ‘mule i’ th’ garden’ but what ’ll be as easy getten shut on as this has been this afternooin.”

“Gooid lad Slinger!  Tha talks like a book.  Aw believe if tha’d had a better bringin up tha’d ha’ made a philosipher says Molly.”

“Tha had a fancy once to be a police ossifer hadn’t ta said Jim?  But aw think tha’s getten that nooation purged aght on thi nah?”

“Well, aw gate it swill’d aght on me ony way.  But aw think some times’ at it towt me a bit o’ sense, an’ whoiver he is ’at wants to raise hissen up, by poolin somdy else daan, aw hope he’ll get sarved ith’ same way; for when a chap shuts his een to ivery body’s interests but his own he desarves to be dropt on—­but if we’d all to strive to lend one another a hand, things ud go on a deal smoother, an’ as nooan on us is perfect, we ought to try by kindness an’ gooid natur an by practisin a bit o’ patience to mak one another’s rooad as pleasant as we con, an if we stuck to that we should find fewer mules i’ th’ garden.”

* * * * * * *

“O! an’ soa that’s th’ tale abaght Slinger, is it Ezra?”

“That’s it uncle, its done nah.”

“Its abaght time it wor, an’ th’ next time tha comes here an’ brings a tale wi’ thi mak it hauf as long an’ it’ll be twice as welcome.”