“Well, what’s come o’ Slinger?” said Molly.

“Oh, he’s all reight—­he’s gooin through his degrees to get made into a sargent or a corporal or some other sort ov a ral, but aw’ll bet he’ll wish it wor his funeral afoor aw’ve done wi’ him.”

Jimmy sat comfortably suppin’ his stiffshackle an smokin’ a bit o’ bacca, an tried by all th’ means in his power to wheedle th’ owd woman into his way o’ thinkin’.

“Tha mud do wor nor ha’ me mun” he said, “aw’m nut ovver handsome aw know, but ther’s nowt abaght me to flay onybody.”

“Ther’ll nubby be freetened o’ thee lad, tha need’nt think,” shoo says, “for tha reminds me ov a walkin’ cloaas peg—­if tha’d been split a bit heigher up tha’d ha’ done for a pair o’ cart shafts.”

“Well tha knows beauty’s i’th eye o’th beholder,” says Jim.

“They’d be able to put all thy beauty i’ ther e’e an see noa war for it,” shoo says.

“Well, aw’m willin’ to work an keep thi a lady as far as th’ brass ’ll gaa.”

“What mack ov a lady aw should like to know?  Th’ same as aw am nah aw reckon, up to th’ elbows i’ soap suds.  But once for all aw want thi to understand at aw’m nooan i’th weddin’ vein at present.”

“Well tha’rt a hard-hearted woman, that’s what tha art—­an nooan as gooid ith’ bottom as tha mud be, or else tha’d niver live here chaitin’ th’ excise for a livin’, astead o’ being th’ wife ov a daycent chap.  Aw ommost wish aw’d letten them chaps catch thi; it ud nobbut ha sarved thi reight.”

“Sarved me reight, wod it?  Well tha con goa an fotch Slinger aght o’ th’ pigcoit (for aw reckon he’s thear yet), but ha mich better ar ta, at sits thear suppin’ it?  But whether aw’m as gooid as aw should be or net, aw’m sure tha’rt a gooid-for-nowt, an th’ sooiner tha taks thi hook aght o’ this haase an’ th’ better, for aw’ve studden thy nonsense woll aw’m fair staled.  Are ta baan?  For if tha doesn’t tha’ll get this poaker abaght thi heead.”

“Nay!  Nay! tha doesn’t mean it?” said Jim, jumpin’ aght o’th gate, “tha wodn’t hurt me surelee?”

“Hurt thi! drabbit thi up, tha’s spun me to th’ length—­ger aght o’ that door.”

Jimmy kept backin’ aght step by step, an’ Molly wor flourishin’ th’ poaker, but nother on em saw at th’ peggy-tub wor fair i’th gate woll Jim backed slap into it.  Splash went th’ watter o’ ivery side, an’ Molly skriked, “A’a dear! sarved thi reight, as if tha could’nt see a whole tub!  What are ta splashin’ like that for?”

But poor Jimmy couldn’t spaik, for he wor wedged as fast as a thief in a miln, an’ nowt but his legs an’ his arms could be seen.  Molly catched howd on his legs an’ tried to pool him aght, but th’ heigher shoo lifted his feet an’ th’ lower sank his heead, soa ther wor noa way to do but to roll it over an’ teem him aght.

“This beats all,” says Molly, as shoo helped him up, “couldn’t ta see it?”

“Does ta think aw’ve a e’e i’ th’ back o’ my heead?” he said, “it’s all long o’ thee, an’ dang it that watters whoot.”