The English exhibit has a model of H.M.S.  Victoria, three hundred and sixty feet long; there is a immense lookin’-glass behind this model, so as to make it look complete, and it is a sight to behold—­a sight.

Why, the U.S. has models of their great steamships, the Etruria and the Umbria, and there are every kind of vessels that wuz ever hearn on, for trade, pleasure, or war, and all kinds of Oriental ships, and all kinds of craft that ever floated in every ocean and river of the known world.

From a miniature Egyptian canoe, found in a tomb, to the sheep-skin rafts of the Euphrates and the dugouts of Africa, with sails, to the gorgeous sail-boats of the Adriatic and the most ancient vessels in the world.

What a sight! what a sight!  It would take weeks to jest count ’em, let alone studyin’ ’em as you ort.

And every machine in the known world for propellin’ boats and railways, from steam to lightnin’.

Where wuz my old mair in such a seen?  Oh, ask my droopin’ sperits where wuz she?

And there wuz everything about protection of life and property, communication at sea, protection against storms and fire, and all kinds of light-houses and divin’ apparatus, and pontoons for raisin’ sunken vessels out of the depths of the sea.

And relics of Arctic explorations, every one on ’em weighted down with memories of cold, and hunger, and frozen death.

And then there wuz movin’ platforms and sidewalks.  The idee!  What would Submit and Miss Henzy say—­to go out from our house and stand stun-still on the side of the road and be moved over to Miss Solomon Corkses!

Oh, my soul, oh, my soul, think on’t!

And there wuz what they called a gravity road.

And I asked Josiah “what he spozed that wuz?” and he said,

“He guessed it meant our country roads in the spring or fall.”

Sez he, “If them roads won’t make a man feel grave to drive over ’em, or a horse feel grave, too, as they are a-wadin’ up to their knees in the mud, and a-draggin’ a wagon stuck half way up over the hub in slush and thick mud”—­

Sez he, “If a man won’t feel grave under such circumstances, and a horse, too, then I don’t know what will make him.”

“Wall,” sez I, “if I wuz in Uncle Sam’s place I wouldn’t try to display ’em to foreign nations.”  Sez I, “They are disgraces to our country, and I would hush ’em up.”

“Yes,” sez Josiah; “that is a woman’s first idee to cover up sunthin’.”

Sez he, “I honor the old man a-comin’ right out and ownin’ up his weaknesses.  The country roads are shameful, and he knew it, and he knew that we knew it; so why not come right out open and show ’em up?”

“Wall,” sez I, “it would look as well agin in him to show a good road—­a good country road, that one could go over in the spring of the year without wishin’ to do as Job did—­curse God and die.”

Sez Josiah, “Job didn’t do that; his wife wanted him to, and he refused; men hain’t profane naterally.”