I mean you’ve only got to go back to where you played your third and you’ll see that it must be so, won’t you?  Very well, then, don’t argue.

But BD is equal to BA and AC, for AD is equal to AC; it had to be, you remember.

Therefore—­now follow this closely—­the two sides BA and AC are together greater than the third side BC.

That means, you see, that by pulling your drive out to the left there you gave yourself a lot of extra distance to cover.

You’d never have guessed that, would you?  But old EUCLID did.

Come along, then; they’re putting.  You must be more careful at this hole.

I think it’s that right shoulder of yours ...

A. P. H.

* * * * *

=Our Candid Candidates.=

From an election address:—­

    “Should I get returned as your representative you will have no
    cause for regret when my term of office expires.”—­Provincial
    Paper.

* * * * *

    “The strike of the mechanical staff of the ‘Karachi Daily Gazette’
    has ended.”

    Evening Paper.

We wondered why everybody looked so pleased in London that day.

* * * * *

“Since her treatment with the monkey gland Miss Ediss has received enough complimentary nuts to stock a market garden.  An ornate basket of monkey nuts fills a prominent place in her room, and two cocoanuts tied up with coloured ribbon strike the eye of the visitor.”—­Sunday Paper.

In that case we shall postpone our intended visit until Miss EDISS is herself again.

* * * * *

[Illustration:  =MANNERS AND MODES.=

NOW THAT MEN’S ATTIRE IS SO COSTLY WHY NOT TAKE A LEAF FROM THE LADIES’ BOOK OF FASHION AND LET THE TAILORS HAVE DRESS PARADES OF THE LATEST DESIGNS?]

* * * * *

[Illustration:  THE CULT OF FACE-READING.

’Erb (a cinema habitue).  “SEE WOT ’E’S SAYING, EM’LY? ’E’S STILL AT THE OFFICE AND WON’T BE ABLE TO GET ’OME TO DINNER.”]

* * * * *

=THE CONSPIRATORS.=

VI.

MY DEAR CHARLES,—­I was talking to the Editor the other day about this correspondence of ours which we are conducting in the public Press, thus saving the twopenny stamps and avoiding the increased cost of living which is hitting everyone else so hard.

“This ought to be put a stop to,” said he.

“That is just what I have been saying since 1918,” I replied; “but the question is what to do about it?  When you get down to it, the word ‘Bolshevist’ is but the Russian for ‘advanced Socialist,’ and there is nothing to prevent Socialists, whether they be advanced or retarded.  How then are you going to put a stop to Bolshevism?”