Wuz out in de grove a-waitin’ fu’ de meetin’ to begin;
    Ef dat crowd had got converted ‘twould a been de end o’ sin.

    Lize wuz der in all her glory, purty ez a big sunflowah,
    I kin ’member how she looked jes same ez ’twuz dis ve’y houah.

    But to make ma story shorter, w’ile we wuz a-waitin’ der,
    Down de road we spied a cloud o’ dus’ dat filled up all de air.

    An’ ez we kep’ on a-lookin’, out f’om ’mongst dat ve’y cloud,
    Sam, on Marse John’s big mule, Caesar, rode right slam up in de crowd.

    You jes oughtah seed dat darkey, ’clar I like tah loss ma bref;
    Fu’ to use a common ’spression, he wuz ’bout nigh dressed to def.

    He had slipped to town dat Sat’day, didn’t let nobody know,
    An’ had car’yd all his cash an’ lef it in de dry goods sto’.

    He had on a bran’ new suit o’ sto’-bought clo’es, a high plug hat;
    He looked ‘zactly like a gen’man, tain’t no use d’nyin’ dat.

    W’en he got down off dat mule an’ bowed to Liza I could see
    How she looked at him so ‘dmirin’, an’ jes kinder glanced at me.

    Den I know’d to win dat gal, I sho would need some othah means
    ‘Sides a-hangin’ ‘round big meetin’ in a suit o’ homespun jeans.

    W’en dey blow’d de ho’n fu’ preachin’, an’ de crowd all went inside,
    I jes felt ez doh I’d like tah go off in de woods an’ hide.

    So I stay’d outside de meetin’, set’n underneat’ de trees,
    Seemed to me I sot der ages, wid ma elbows on ma knees.

    W’en dey sung dat hymn, “Nobody knows de trouble dat I see,”
    Seem’d to me dat dey wuz singin’ eveh word o’ it fu’ me.

    Jes how long I might ha’ sot der, actin’ like a cussed fool,
    I don’t know, but it jes happen’d dat I look’d an’ saw Sam’s mule.

    An’ de thought come slowly tricklin’ thoo ma brain right der an’ den,
    Dat, perhaps, wid some persuasion, I could make dat mule ma fren’.

    An’ I jes kep’ on a-thinkin’, an’ I kep’ a-lookin’ ‘roun’,
    Tel I spied two great big san’ spurs right close by me on de groun’.

    Well, I took dem spurs an’ put em underneat’ o’ Caesar’s saddle,
    So dey’d press down in his backbone soon ez Sam had got a-straddle.

    ‘Twuz a pretty ticklish job, an’ jes ez soon ez it wuz done,
    I went back w’ere I wuz set’n fu’ to wait an’ see de fun.

    Purty soon heah come de people, jes a-swa’min’ out de do’,
    Talkin’ ’bout de “pow’ful sermon”—­“nevah heah’d de likes befo’.”

    How de “monahs fell convicted” jes de same ez lumps o’ lead,
    How dat some wuz still a-layin’ same es if dey’d been struck dead.

    An’ to rectly heah come Liza, Sam a-strollin’ by her side,
    An’ it seem’d to me dat darky’s smile wuz ’bout twelve inches wide.

    Look to me like he had swelled up to ’bout twice his natchul size,
    An’ I heah’d him say, “I’d like to be yo’ ’scort to-night, Miss Lize.”