“Why did you dare to take them off when I put them on?”

“Because I was like the cat in the proverb, not that I was after mice you know, but I couldn’t fire in gloves.”

“Well, your firing is done now, and I shall expect you to come to me in the workroom, immediately after breakfast, to have these gloves put on again.  Do you hear me, sir?”

“Yes.”

“And what else?  Do you mean to obey?”

“Oh, yes, Miss Carmichael, of course, always, with the greatest joy in the world.”

“Nobody asked you, sir, to obey always.”

“I beg your pardon, Miss Carmichael, I’m afraid I’m a little confused.”

“Then I hope you will not put me to confusion, as you did this morning.”

“I’m awfully sorry,” said the mendacious lawyer, “but it was the coat and collar, you know.”  Then most illogically, he added, “I’d like to wear this coat and this collar all the time.”

“No, you would not; they are not at all becoming to you.  Oh, do look at poor Mr. Bangs!”

The detective’s sleeves were turned back, thanks to Mrs. Carmichael, but, as he sat at breakfast, the voluminous coat sagged over his shoulder, and down came the eclipsing sleeve over his coffee cup.  When he righted matters with his left hand, the coat slewed round to the other side, knocked his fork out of his hand, and fell with violence on his omelet.  The Captain looked at him, and bawled:  “I say, mate, you’ve got to have a reef took in your back topsel.  You don’t mind a bit of reef tackle in the back of your coat, do you, John?” The Squire did not object; so Miss Carmichael was despatched to the sewing room for two large pins, and she and the Captain between them pinched up the back of the coat longitudinally to the proper distance, and pinned the detective up a little more than was necessary.

“Whey,” asked he of his nautical ally, “em I consistent es a cherecter in bowth phases of my berrowed cowt?”

“I know,” chuckled the Captain; “’cause then you had too much slack on your pins, and now you’ve got too much pins in your slack, haw! haw!”

“Try egain.”

Coristine ventured, “Because then your hands were in your cuffies, but now your coffee’s in your hand.”  This was hooted down as perfectly inadmissible, Miss Carmichael asking him how he dared to make such an exhibition of himself.  Mr. Errol was wrestling with something like Toulouse and Toulon, but could not conquer it.  Then the detective said:  “If the ledies will be kind eneugh not to listen, I should enswer, Before I wes loose in my hebits, end now I em tight.”

Of course the Captain applauded, but the lawyer’s reprover remarked to him that she did not think that last at all a nice word.  He agreed with her that it was abominable, that no language was strong enough to reprobate it, and then they left the table.