Politeness an Armor.—­There is no better armor against rudeness and discourtesy than politeness.  The individual is impervious to slights and snubs who can meet them with the courtesy which at once puts the common person in his proper place as the inferior.

A woman is shocked and repelled by disagreeable manners in a man, manifested in discourtesy toward her, by an awkward manner, coarse speech, incivility, neglect of the little attentions she expects of a man and which men of breeding render as a matter of course.  A woman is more likely to fall in love with a homely man of pleasing address than with an Adonis so clad in self-complacency that he thinks politeness unnecessary, or one who does not know its forms.

THE ETIQUETTE OF THE HAT.

The first rule a man should observe in regard to his hat is never to wear it in the presence of women, save in the open.  If mothers would take the trouble to train their small sons to rigid observance of the rule of removing their head covering the moment they enter the house there would, be fewer adults guilty of this particular discourtesy, which is at once the greatest and the most common.  One occasionally sees a man wearing his hat and preceding a woman down the aisle of a theatre.

The expression, “tipping the hat,” is a vulgarism.  A man doesn’t “tip” his hat, he raises it quite off his head.

[762 Mothers’ remedies]

The Coachman’s Salute.—­The semi-military salute—­raising the hand to the hat as if to lift it, but merely approaching the forefinger to the brim—­is a discourtesy to a woman.  Such a salute would bring a reproof in military circles; it is objectionable among men.  Actually it is the manner in which a man-servant acknowledges an order from his master or mistress, and is not inaptly called “the coachman’s salute.”

A man wears his hat on the street, on the deck of the steamboat, in a picture-gallery or promenade concert-room.  He removes it in a theatre, the opera-house, and the parlors of a hotel.

When to Raise the Hat.—­Men raise their hats to each other on the street.  They extend the same courtesy to all members of their family, of both sexes.  A well-bred man raises his hat to his little daughter, as he would to his wife.

On the street, a man must wait for a lady to recognize him, but should be ready to remove his hat simultaneously with her greeting, raising and replacing it quickly.  The fashion of removing the hat after meeting a lady is absurd.  How does she know the courtesy has been extended?

When a man is with a lady who recognizes an acquaintance, he must raise his hat, whether he knows the individual or not.  He should, however, keep his eyes straight ahead, not looking at the person.

If he meets a man walking with a lady whom he does not know, he waits the man’s recognition.

A man removes his hat in an elevator if women enter or are already inside.  This rule is often ignored in large public buildings.