A Grave Mistake.—­The greatest mistake the debutante can make is to treat with carelessness and lack of respect the matrons, young or old, to whom she is introduced.  In the arrogance of her youth and ignorance she may think them “old frumps” and devote herself to her mates in age and inexperience.  But the “old frumps” hold the trump cards; she will be dependent on them for invitations to many pleasant little functions, especially those exclusive affairs to which it is an honor to be invited, and if she is not personally agreeable, there will always be some one else to take the place that might have been hers, for a chaperon often influences a young man’s invitations.  Moreover, by her disrespect for age and position she advertises her lack of good breeding and social training.

Her Dress.—­The debutante dresses in white at her “coming-out party,” as a rule; white being supposed to typify her virginal attitude in the social realm.  The mother receives her guests with her daughter standing at her side.  It is not uncommon for two girls of about the same age who are close friends to be introduced at the same function.  The celebrant’s friends send flowers; sometimes the number of bouquets is so great that a screen is arranged behind her on which they are displayed.  Girls pique themselves on the number of such tributes.

[722 Mothers’ remedies]

If Not a Belle.—­But suppose a girl is not pretty enough, nor rich enough, nor attractive enough to become a social success.  She will suffer countless mortifications.  In society, as in business, “Nothing succeeds like success.”  If she is popular, she will have a very happy time as debutante.  If she is not “a success,” her chaperon will despair of her.  She will be partnerless when other girls have too many; she will have to retire to the dressing-room, deeply humiliated because unescorted to the supper-room.  She will be a wall-flower while others dance.  Young men are very selfish; unless a girl has some claim to consideration, personally, or they expect invitations through her parents, they often will selfishly neglect her.

What shall she do in such a case?  She will be happier and more contented to give up the losing fight, find some sphere that is congenial, and determine to adorn it.  There are many kinds of belles; she may make herself a belle of the home, a belle in out-door sports, a queen of the chafing-dish.  Far better these humbler triumphs than neglect and unhappiness in the social world.

A girl looks forward to her debut with many joyous anticipations, but often finds her second social season a happier one than her first.  She is more sure of herself, less shy and reserved; little things—­the small mistakes made through ignorance—­do not worry her so much; she has gained ease and grace of manner, having shed her self-consciousness.

THE ETIQUETTE OF BALLS.