The best personal asset a girl can have is “nice manners;” they will contribute more to her lasting popularity than beauty or wealth.  Girls sometimes wonder how it happens that a girl they have regarded as “too homely” to be accounted dangerous, still carries off the matrimonial prize of “her set.”  Ten chances to one it is because she has that charm of manner that makes a man overlook her physical deficiencies.  Her manners, in such case, are the spontaneous expression of a kind and generous disposition, aided, of course, by a familiarity with the social code that prevents awkwardness.  She has ease, and that puts others at their ease; she is companionable; and not being engrossed by her own good looks, she has had time to cultivate the intellectual graces.

[718 Mothers’ remedies]

Nothing is more becoming to a young girl than respect and deference to her elders.  If for no other reason than that it gives observers an unfavorable opinion of her manners, she should avoid any disrespect or rudeness toward her parents or older sisters.  The young girl is often negligent in this respect.  Her own ego is exaggerated, owing to her youth and inexperience; she thinks

    “What there is to know, I know it;
    What I don’t know isn’t knowledge;”

and is much inclined to dub her own mother “old-fashioned.”  So she contradicts her, precedes her in entering a room, takes the easiest chair, monopolizes the conversation, and in other disrespectful ways endeavors to assert her own importance.  Instead of crediting her with more social experience, bystanders consider her a very crude and untrained young person.

Deference to Age.—­One reason why convent training is so highly esteemed in our best circles is because girls are taught such beautiful manners.  No convent-bred girl would think of showing the slightest disrespect to an older person.  They are taught all the little matters of etiquette that contribute to gentle and refined manners.  A lady staying at a large summer hotel noted the charming manners of a young Southern girl, especially in regard to the unfailing deference paid to her mother and aunt.  She rose when they addressed her and remained standing during the conversation.  When the aunt came to the breakfast table the girl rose, standing until the elder lady was seated; if her mother entered one of the reception rooms she excused herself if conversing and advanced to meet her, finding a seat for her and perhaps asking permission to introduce an acquaintance.  And it was all done so easily, so naturally, that it was plainly seen there was no affectation, but the unstudied courtesy due to good-breeding.