“’If it costs you nothing in money, and if it is something very ingenious and pretty, I will ...  I will kiss you.’

“The next day, I was in Cologne.  It was the case of a terrible accident, which had thrown a whole family into despair, and a difficult amputation was necessary.  They put me up; I might say, they almost locked me up, and I saw nobody but people in tears, who almost deafened me with their lamentations; I operated on a man who appeared to be in a moribund state, and who nearly died under my hands, and with whom I remained two nights, and then, when I saw that there was a chance for his recovery, I drove to the station.  I had, however, made a mistake in the trains, and I had an hour to wait, and so I wandered about the streets, still thinking of my poor patient, when a man accosted me.  I do not know German, and he was totally ignorant of French, but at last I made out that he was offering me some relics.  I thought of Gilberte, for I knew her fanatical devotion, and here was my present ready to hand, so I followed the man into a shop where religious objects were for sale, and I bought a small piece of a bone of one of the Eleven Thousand Virgins.

“The pretended relic was enclosed in a charming, old silver box, and that determined my choice, and putting my purchase into my pocket, I went to the railway station, and so to Paris.

“As soon as I got home, I wished to examine my purchase again, and on taking hold of it, I found that the box was open, and the relic lost!  It was no good to hunt in my pocket, and to turn it inside out; the small bit of bone, which was no bigger than half a pin, had disappeared.

“You know, my dear little Abbe, that my faith is not very great, but, as my friend, you are magnanimous enough to put up with my coldness, and to leave me alone, and to wait for the future, so you say.  But I absolutely disbelieve in the relics of second-hand dealers in piety, and you share my doubts in that respect.  Therefore, the loss of that bit of sheep’s carcass did not grieve me, and I easily procured a similar fragment, which I carefully fastened inside my jewel, and then I went to see my intended.

“As soon as she saw me, she ran up to me, smiling and anxious, and said to me: 

“‘What have you brought me?’

“I pretended to have forgotten, but she did not believe me, and I made her beg me, and beseech me, even.  But when I saw that she was devoured by curiosity, I gave her the sacred silver box.  She appeared over-joyed.

“‘A relic!  Oh!  A relic!’

“And she kissed the box passionately, so that I was ashamed of my deception.  She was not quite satisfied, however, and her uneasiness soon turned to terrible fear, and looking straight into my eyes, she said: 

“‘Are you sure that it is authentic?’

“‘Absolutely certain.’

“‘How can you be so certain?’

“I was caught, for to say that I had bought it through a man in the streets, would be my destruction.  What was I to say?  A wild idea struck me, and I said, in a low, mysterious voice: