The Awakening eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 403 pages of information about The Awakening.

The Awakening eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 403 pages of information about The Awakening.

From this day on the relations between Nekhludoff and Katiousha were changed, and there were established between them those peculiar relations which are customary between two innocent young people who are attached to each other.

As soon as Katiousha entered the room, or even when Nekhludoff saw her white apron from afar, everything became immediately as if lit by the sun; everything became more interesting, more cheerful, more important; life became more joyful.  She experienced the same feeling.  But not alone the presence and proximity of Katiousha had such effect upon Nekhludoff; the very thought of her existence had the same power upon him as that of his had upon her.  Whether he received an unpleasant letter from his mother, or was backward in his composition, or felt the ceaseless sadness of youth, it would suffice for him to see her and his spirit resumed its wonted good cheer.

Katiousha had to do all the housework, but she managed to do her duty and found spare time for reading.  He gave her the works of Dostoievsky and Tourgenieff to read.  Those descriptive of the beauties of nature she liked best.  Their conversations were but momentary, when they met in the corridor, on the veranda, in the court-yard, or in the room of the aunts’ old servant, Matriena Pavlovna, with whom Katiousha roomed, or in the servants’ chamber, whither Nekhludoff sometimes went to drink tea.  And these conversations in the presence of Matriena Pavlovna were the pleasantest.  When they were alone their conversation flagged.  Then the eyes would speak something different, more important, than the mouth; the lips were drawn up, they felt uncomfortable, and quickly parted.

These relations continued during the time of his first visit to his aunts.  The aunts noticed them, were dismayed, and immediately wrote to the Princess Elena Ivanovna, Nekhludoff’s mother.  But their anxiety was unfounded; Nekhludoff, without knowing it, loved Katiousha, as innocent people love, and this very love was the principal safeguard against either his or her fall.  Not only did he not desire to possess her physically, but the very thought of such relation horrified him.  There was more reason in the poetical Sophia Ivanovna’s fear that Nekhludoff’s having fallen in love with a girl, might take a notion to marry her without regard to her birth or station.

If Nekhludoff were clearly conscious of his love for Katiousha; especially if it were sought to persuade him that he could and must not link his fate to that of the girl, he would very likely have decided in his plumb-line mind that there was no reason why he should not marry her, no matter who she was, provided he loved her.  But the aunts did not speak of their fears, and he departed without knowing that he was enamored of Katiousha.

He was certain that his feeling toward Katiousha was but a manifestation of that joy which pervaded his entire being, and which was shared by that lovely, cheerful girl.  However, when he was taking leave, and Katiousha, standing on the veranda with the aunts, followed him with her black, tearful and somewhat squinting eyes, he felt that he was leaving behind him something beautiful, precious, which would never recur.  And he became very sad.

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The Awakening from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.