Because the door is apt to slam, which would be exceedingly unpleasant, and might suggest the idea that you went out in a passion—­valued as . . . 4

If it did not slam, it might still make
a creaking noise--valued as . . . . . . . . . . 2

Supposing it to make no noise at all, the impression is conveyed that you are going away never to return, whereas you have no such intention, . . . . . . . . . . . . 1

  Chances of your causing a noise to disturb
  the company on opening the door when you
  return, . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2

Probable loss of character by conveying
the notion, that you are peremptory and
abrupt in manners, . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3

Giving the parties remaining the option
of shutting, or not, as suits their fancy, . . 2

That by leaving the door open, you do not
commit yourself to a determinate act, . . . . . 2
—­
16

FOR SHUTTING.

That a cold wind may not blow into the room; but this not probable, for it will be easy for those remaining in the apartment to rise and shut the door themselves, . . . . . . . . . 1

That by a faint possibility you may give
offence by leaving the door open, . . . . . . . 1

That you may prevent persons outside overhearing
what is said; this of small account, for people
should not speak about things they do not wish
to be repeated, . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1
—­
3

Deducting 3 from 16, 13 remain.  Result—­balance of 13-19ths in favour of not shutting the door.  Nothing, therefore, could be more clearly demonstrated than that the Scotch are strongly justified in leaving the door open when they quit an apartment.  Doubts, indeed, may be entertained as to the values arbitrarily put on the respective items in the account:  but to venture into this remote part of the inquiry would be to plunge us into the depths of metaphysics.  Even supposing we were to make the matter as clear as the sun at noonday, there would still be sceptics.  On shewing the above arithmetical calculation, for example, to an English lady, who has for a number of years studied Scotch character and manners, she, with a degree of bluntness that was exceedingly startling, gave it as her unqualified opinion, that the whole thing was a piece of nonsense; and that the only reason, as far as she could observe, why the Scotch do not shut the door, is that they have never been taught that it is consistent with good-manners to do so.  The audacity of some people is really wonderful!

EDFOU AND ITS NEIGHBOURHOOD.