Such, Simon, if I were a Parliament man,
  The basis would be, and the scope, of my plan! 
  But my rushlight is drooping—­so trusting diurnally,
  To hear your opinion—­believe me eternally
  (Whilst swearing affection, best swear in the lump)
  Your obedient,
      devoted,
          admiring,
              JOHN STUMP.

[1] The exact tune of this interesting song it has not been in
our power to discover—­it is, however, undoubtedly a truly
national melody.

[2] After due inquiry we have satisfied ourselves that the
individual here mentioned is not H.M.’s late
Solicitor-General, but one Jonathan Wilde, touching whose
history vide Jack Sheppard.

* * * * *

PROSPECTUS FOR A NEW HAND-BOOK OF JESTERS;

OR, YOUNG JOKER’S BEST COMPANION.

    “All the world’s a joke, and all the men and women merely
    jokers.”—­Shakspeare.  From the text of Joseph Miller.

Messrs. GAG and GAMMON beg most respectfully to call the strict attention of the reading public to the following brief prospectus of their forthcoming work “On Jokes for all subjects.”  Messrs. GAG and GAMMON pledge themselves to produce an article at present unmatched for application and originality, upon such terms as must secure them the patronage and lasting gratitude of their many admirers.  Messrs. GAG and GAMMON propose dividing their highly-seasoned and warranted-to-keep-in-any-climate universal facetiae into the following various heads, departments, or classes:—­

General jokes for all occasions; chiefly applicable to individuals’ names, expressive of peculiar colours.

A very superior article on Browns—­if required, bringing in said Browns in Black and White.

Embarrassed do., very humorous, with Duns; and a choice selection of unique references to the copper coin of the realm.  Worthy the attention of young beginners, and very safe for small country towns, with one wit possessed of a good horse-laugh for his own, or rather Messrs. G. and G.’s jokes.

Do. do. on Greens, very various:  bring in Sap superbly, and Pea with peculiar power; with a short cut to Lettus (Lettuce), and Hanson’s Patent Safety,—­a beautiful allusion to the “Cab-age.”  May be tried when there is an attorney and young doctor, with a perfect certainty of success.

Do. do. do.  On Wiggins; very pungent, suitable to the present political position; offering a beautiful contrast of Wig-ins and Wig-outs; capable of great ramifications, and may be done at least twice a-night in a half whisper in mixed society.

Also some “Delightful Dinner Diversions, or Joke Sauces for all Joints.”

Calves-head.—­Brings in fellow-feeling; family likeness; cannibalism; “tete-a-tete”; while the brain sauce and tongue are never-failing.