I have also the satisfaction to inform you, that, by the acute diplomatic skill of my never-to-be-sufficiently-eulogised Secretary of State for Foreign Affairs, that, after innumerable and complicated negotiations, he has at length succeeded in seducing his Majesty the King of the French to render to England the tardy justice of commemorating, by a fete and inauguration at Boulogne, the disinclination of the French, at a former period, to invade the British dominions.

    GENTLEMEN OF THE HOUSE OF COMMONS,

I have directed the estimates for the next fortnight to be laid before you, which, I am happy to inform you, will be amply sufficient for the exigencies of my present disinterested advisers.

The unequalled fiscal and arithmetical talents of my Chancellor of the Exchequer have, by the most rigid economy, succeeded in reducing the revenue very considerably below the actual expenditure of the state.

    MY LORDS AND GENTLEMEN,

Measures will be speedily submitted to you for carrying out the admirable plans of my Secretary of State for the Colonial Department, and the brilliant author of “Don Carlos,” for the prevention of apoplexy among paupers, and the reduction of the present extravagant dietary of the Unions.

I have the gratification to announce that a commission is in progress, by which it is proposed by my non-patronage Ministers to call into requisition the talents of several literary gentlemen—­all intimate friends or relations of my deeply erudite and profoundly philosophic Secretary of State for the Home Department, and author of “Yes and No,” (three vols.  Colburn) for the purpose of extending the knowledge of reading and writing, and the encouragement of circulating libraries all over the kingdom.

My consistent and uncompromising Secretary of State for the Colonies, having, since the publication of his spirited “Essays by a gentleman who has lately left his lodgings,” totally changed his opinions on the subject of the Corn Laws, a measure is in the course of preparation with a view to the repeal of those laws, and the continuance in office of my invaluable, tenacious, and incomparable ministry.

CAUTION.—­We have just heard from a friend in Somerset House, that it is the intention of the Commissioners of Stamps, from the glaring puffs embodied in the above speech, to proceed for the advertisement duty against all newspapers in which it is inserted.  For ourselves, we will cheerfully pay.

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A German, resident in New York, has such a remarkably hard name, that he spoils a gross of steel pens indorsing a bill.

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