“It was now time to discuss the well-ordained set-out of viands.  Round after round, the most delicious, came on with that disorder so characteristic of English servants.  It will, Uncle Sam, be scarcely necessary for Smooth to add that great skill was displayed in safely depositing the meats and drinks in nature’s most appropriate depot.  Most cheerfully was it performed to the accompaniment of music, merry laughs, and flashes of well-worn wit:  the only discord discoverable, or which could offend delicate ears, being that one or two English Gentlemen, of very polished manners, obstinately refused to be contented with the long list of wines provided by the generous host, and must needs display their cultivated taste by ordering bottles of a name scarce known, assuring the polite landlord that they themselves would pay the shot did Citizen Peabody fail to stand it.  Mr. Smooth had not the least objection to this delicate proceeding inasmuch as it illustrated a principle, and contrasted strangely with those much cultivated manners facetious gentlemen who so often waste ink in discoursing upon the vulgarities of Americans would have us fashion from.  Wishing, however, these gentlemen may display better manners next time, we must beg the reader’s pardon for thus digressing and proceed.

“The meats having laid a very decided foundation upon which to build a tabernacle of joviality, and the nectar adding its exhilarating power in erecting a substratum for the fine work of the festival, it became necessary to top off with spicy speeches, which might indeed be compared to a compound of salt and cream very liberally mixed.  From among his guests and great folks Citizen Peabody now rose, somewhat nervous, and with becoming dignity delivered himself of a very piquant speech, the bone and marrow of which was that Americans from home being moved by those sentiments the appearance of things new and strange naturally produce, the sequence was that they looked with an interest divided between reverence and curiosity to see their Minister; such a gratification he was only too happy in being the medium of affording.  Nor, when he relieved that worthy representative of a tax his purse could ill bear, did he consider it less than a very agreeable duty.  In reply to Citizen Peabody’s toast, ’Peace and continued friendship between the peoples of England and the United States,’ the guests filled a bumper, and with three hearty cheers let the liquid run down so smoothly.  Sir Arthur Coddlecomb’s name being coupled with the toast, and that compound of self-importance and bad grammar esteeming himself a great speaker, rose, and relieved himself of what is commonly called a very neat and appropriate speech.  To Smooth his mind seemed on a wandering expedition; notwithstanding, he took occasion to refer to that approaching curse—­an Eastern war, and also to divest himself of some very fine words, highly complimentary of America.  Marked applause followed the speech, and Sir Arthur sat down bowing.