“’Well, seeing it’s you—­not a bad sort of a chap, by the way, I don’t much care if I do; but don’t let go any grape until I gets under yer lee—­perhaps we’d better fight it out on your gun-deck.  Captain, my dear fellow (here the captain looked as good-natured as a turtle studying law) any way to suit your own canister!’ returned the rear-admiral of Uncle John’s best blue.

“‘I say, while you are about it, Admiral,’ rejoined the Yankee, with a sort of half flirtish, half earnest air—­while you are about to come broad on, just bring all the good folks with you—­and don’t forget the ladies; bring them, too.  There’s nothing like plenty of fair faces when a strong battle is to be fought!’ This was a right good say on the part of Commodore Shubrick (such was the Yankee skipper’s name), who smiled all over his wrinkled face.  It was quite enough.  The gallant Britisher’s face, too, brightened up with good-nature, the boatswain sounded his whistle, the savage guns disappeared in their ports; the yards were manned with jolly tars, and away streaked the admiral in his barge, skimming the sullen water, towards the Yankee, under a heavy cannonade of grape.  The ladies, loving and affectionate souls! couldn’t stand it another minute, and, with a Joan of Arc heroism, volunteered to follow the gallant admiral, for the purpose of seeing that their sweethearts and husbands were not seriously wounded by the Commander’s grape and other missiles most dangerous.  Again loud reports were heard—­pop! pop! pop!—­ziz! ziz! ziz! went the shots of ordinary mixture:  then whole broadsides began to be poured into the belligerents in grand style.  After a few hours’ cannonading, all was again bustle and confusion; wounded men were seen tumbling over the sides of the ship, fair ladies became unfairly terrified, and then, disgusted with the cowardice of their husbands and sweethearts, might be seen nearly fainting in the arms of gallant officers.  After the whole affair was over, a great many wounded husbands, whose cases were extremely doubtful, were conveyed to their homes; others dreaded the application of Caudle lecture medicine from wives who had long preceded them to their domestic hearths.  A facetious contemporary has described this great affair in the following graphic manner: 

“On attempting to mount the stairs hung at the side, Commodore Shubrick, standing on the quarter-deck, let drive a fish-ball, which he held in his hand, and struck the Admiral a little below the left eye.  The Admiral, nothing daunted, ran up the steps, his officers following close behind, and seized the Commodore by the hand, and gave him such a shaking as made him tremble again.  General Gore, on reaching the ‘poop,’ was grossly insulted by the first lieutenant of the Princeton, who, in the most cool and deliberate manner, told him, if he would come below, he would give him ‘something to eat.’