There were, in this century, superior women in whom was exhibited a high form of love, but who realized that perfect love was impossible in their age; yet they desired to be loved in an intense and legitimate manner.  This phase of womanhood is well represented by Mlle. Aisse and Mlle. de Lespinasse, both of whom felt an irresistible need of loving; they proclaimed their love and not only showed themselves to be capable of loving and of intense suffering, but proved themselves worthy of love which, in its highest form, they felt to be an unknown quantity at that time.  Their love became a constant inspiration, a model of devotion, almost a transfiguration of passion.  These women were products of the time; they had to be, to compensate for the general sterility and barrenness, to equalize the inequalities, and to pay the tribute of vice and debauch.

All the customs of the age were arrayed against pure womanhood and offered it nothing but temptation.  Inasmuch as the husband belonged to court and to war more than to domestic felicity, he left his wife alone for long periods.  The husbands themselves seemed actually to enjoy the infidelity of their wives and were often intimate friends of their wives’ lovers; and it was no rare thing that when the wife found no pleasure in lovers, she did not concern herself about her husband’s mistresses (unless they were intolerably disagreeable to her), often advising the mistress as to the best method of winning her husband.

It must be admitted that this separation in marriage, this reciprocity of liberty, this absolute tolerance, was not a phase of the eighteenth century marriage, but was the very character of it.  In earlier times, in the sixteenth century, infidelity was counted as such and caused trouble in the household.  If the husband abused his privileges, the wife was obliged to bear the insult in silence, being helpless to avenge it.  If she imitated his actions, it was under the gravest dangers to her own life and that of her lover.  The honor of the husband was closely attached to the virtue of the wife; thus, if he sought diversion elsewhere, and his wife fell victim to the fascinations of another, he was ridiculed.  Marriage was but an external bond; in the eighteenth century, it was a bond only as long as husband and wife had affection for one another; when that no longer existed, they frankly told each other and sought that emotion elsewhere; they ceased to be lovers and became friends.

A very fertile source of so much unfaithfulness was the frequent marriage of a ruined nobleman to a girl of fortune, but without rank.  Giving her his name was the only moral obligation; the marriage over and the dowry portion settled, he pursued his way, considering that he owed her no further duty.  Very frequently, the husband, overcome by jealousy or humiliated by the low standard of his wife who injured or brought ridicule upon his name, would have her kidnapped and taken to a convent.  This right was enjoyed by the husband in spite of the general liberty of woman.  A letters-patent was obtained through proof of adultery, and the wife was imprisoned in some convent for the rest of her life, being deprived of her dowry which fell to her husband.