’In America they might pay for lessons in the English accent . . . ’ said Logan.
‘But not,’ said Merton, ’in the Scotch, which is yours; oh distant cousin of a marquis! Consequently by rich American lady pupils “you are not one to be desired."’
‘Tommy, you are impertinent,’ said Logan. ’Oh, hang it, where is there an opening, a demand, for the broken, the stoney broke? A man cannot live by casual paragraphs alone.’
‘And these generally reckoned “too high-toned for our readers,"’ said Merton.
‘If I could get the secretaryship of a golf club!’ Logan sighed.
’If you could get the Chancellorship of the Exchequer! I reckon that there are two million applicants for secretaryships of golf clubs.’
‘Or a land agency,’ Logan murmured.
‘Oh, be practical!’ cried Merton. ’Be inventive! Be modern! Be up to date! Think of something new! Think of a felt want, as the Covenanting divine calls it: a real public need, hitherto but dimly present, and quite a demand without a supply.’
‘But that means thousands in advertisements,’ said Logan, ’even if we ran a hair-restorer. The ground bait is too expensive. I say, I once knew a fellow who ground-baited for salmon with potted shrimps.’
‘Make a paragraph on him then,’ said Merton.
’But results proved that there was no felt want of potted shrimps—or not of a fly to follow.’
’Your collaboration in the search, the hunt for money, the quest, consists merely in irrelevancies and objections,’ growled Merton, lighting a cigarette.
’Lucky devil, Peter Nevison. Meets an heiress on a Channel boat, with 4,000_l_. a year; and there he is.’ Logan basked in the reflected sunshine.
’Cut by her people, though—and other people. I could not have faced the row with her people,’ said Merton musingly.
’I don’t wonder they moved heaven and earth, and her uncle, the bishop, to stop it. Not eligible, Peter was not, however you took him,’ Logan reflected. ‘Took too much of this,’ he pointed to the heraldic flask.
’Well, she took him. It is not much that parents, still less guardians, can do now, when a girl’s mind is made up.’
’The emancipation of woman is the opportunity of the indigent male struggler. Women have their way,’ Logan reflected.
’And the youth of the modern aged is the opportunity of our sisters, the girls “on the make,"’ said Merton. ’What a lot of old men of title are marrying young women as hard up as we are!’
‘And then,’ said Logan, ’the offspring of the deceased marchionesses make a fuss. In fact marriage is always the signal for a family row.’
‘It is the infernal family row that I never could face. I had a chance—’
Merton seemed likely to drop into autobiography.
‘I know,’ said Logan admonishingly.
’Well, hanged if I could take it, and she—she could not stand it either, and both of us—’