‘Who hunts it?’ asked Mr. Jawleyford.

’Why, as to that—­haw,’—­replied Sponge, stretching out his arms and legs to their fullest extent, and yawning most vigorously—­’why, as to that, I can hardly say which you would call my country, for I have to do with so many; but I should say, of all the countries I am—­haw—­connected with—­haw—­Tom Scratch’s is the worst.’

Mr. Jawleyford looked at Mrs. Jawleyford as a counsel who thinks he has made a grand hit looks at a jury before he sits down, and said no more.

Mrs. Jawleyford looked as innocent as most jurymen do after one of these forensic exploits.—­Mr. Sponge beginning his nasal recreations, Mrs. Jawleyford motioned the ladies off to bed—­Mr. Sponge and his host presently followed.

CHAPTER XVIII

THE EVENING’S REFLECTIONS

‘Well, I think he’ll do,’ said our friend to himself, as having reached his bedroom, in accordance with modern fashion, he applied a cedar match to the now somewhat better burnt-up fire, for the purpose of lighting a cigar—­a cigar! in the state-bedroom of Jawleyford Court.  Having divested himself of his smart blue coat and white waistcoat, and arrayed himself in a grey dressing-gown, he adjusted the loose cushions of a recumbent chair, and soused himself into its luxurious depths for a ‘think over.’

‘He has money,’ mused Sponge, between the copious whiffs of the cigar, ‘splendid style he lives in, to be sure’ (puff), continued he, after another long draw, as he adjusted the ash at the end of the cigar.  ’Two men in livery’ (puff), ‘one out, can’t be done for nothing’ (puff).  ’What a profusion of plate, too!’ (whiff)—­’declare I never’ (puff) ‘saw such’ (whiff, puff) ‘magnificence in the whole course of my’ (whiff, puff) ‘life.’

The cigar being then well under way, he sucked and puffed and whiffed in an apparently vacant stupor, his legs crossed, and his eyes fixed on a projecting coal between the lower bars, as if intent on watching the alternations of flame and gas; though in reality he was running all the circumstances through his mind, comparing them with his past experience, and speculating on the probable result of the present adventure.

He had seen a good deal of service in the matrimonial wars, and was entitled to as many bars as the most distinguished peninsular veteran.  No woman with money, or the reputation of it, ever wanted an offer while he was in the way, for he would accommodate her at the second or third interview:  and always pressed for an immediate fulfilment, lest the ’cursed lawyers’ should interfere and interrupt their felicity.  Somehow or other, the ‘cursed lawyers’ always had interfered; and as sure as they walked in, Mr. Sponge walked out.  He couldn’t bear the idea of their coarse, inquisitive inquiries.  He was too much of a gentleman!

    Love, light as air, at sight of human ties
    Spreads his light wings and in a moment flies.