the gate-keeper of heaven applies to St. Thomas, who undertakes to drive away the intruder.  The peasant, however, disconcerts St. Thomas by reminding him of his disbelief, and St. Paul, who comes next, fares no better—­he had persecuted the saints.  At length Christ hears of what had occurred, and comes himself.  The Saviour listens benignantly to the poor soul’s pleading, and ends by forgiving the peasant his sins, and allowing him to remain in Paradise.[156]

  [156] See Meon’s Barbazan, 1808, tome iv, p. 114; also Le
        Grand, 1781, tome ii, p. 190:  “Du Vilain qui gagna
        Paradis en plaidant.”

* * * * *

There exists a very singular English burlesque of the unprofitable sermons of the preaching friars in the Middle Ages, which is worthy of Rabelais himself, and of which this is a modernised extract: 

Mollificant olera durissima crusta.—­“Friends, this is to say to your ignorant understanding, that hot plants and hard crusts make soft hard plants.  The help and the grace of the gray goose that goes on the green, and the wisdom of the water wind-mill, with the good grace of a gallon pitcher, and all the salt sausages that be sodden in Norfolk upon Saturday, be with us now at our beginning, and help us in our ending, and quit you of bliss and both your eyes, that never shall have ending.  Amen.  My dear curst creatures, there was once a wife whose name was Catherine Fyste, and she was crafty in court, and well could carve.  Hence she sent after the four Synods of Rome to know why, wherefore, and for what cause that Alleluja was closed before the cup came once round.  Why, believest thou not, forsooth, that there stood once a cock on St. Paul’s steeple-top, and drew up the strapples of his breech?  How provest thou that tale?  By all the four doctors of Wynberryhills—­that is to say, Vertas, Gadatryne, Trumpas, and Dadyltrymsert—­the which four doctors say there was once an old wife had a cock to her son, and he looked out of an old dove-cot, and warned and charged that no man should be so hardy either to ride or go on St. Paul’s steeple-top unless he rode on a three-footed stool, or else that he brought with him a warrant of his neck”—­and so on, in this fantastical style.

* * * * *

The meaning of the phrase “benefit of clergy” is not perhaps very generally understood.  The phrase had its origin in those days of intellectual darkness, when the state of letters was so low that anyone found guilty in a court of justice of a crime which was punishable with death, if he could prove himself able to read a verse in a Latin Bible he was pardoned, as being a man of learning, and therefore likely to be useful to the state; but if he could not read he was sure to be hanged.  This privilege, it is said, was granted to all offences, excepting high treason and sacrilege, till after the year 1350.  At first it was extended not only to the clergy but to any person that could read, who, however, had to vow that he would enter into holy orders; but with the increase of learning this “benefit to clergy” was restricted by several Acts of Parliament, and it was finally abolished only so late as the reign of George IV.