of a wharf and watch them. I wanted to beat about
the harbor in a catboat, and feel the tug and pull
of the tiller. Kinney protested that that was
no way to spend a vacation or to invite adventure.
His face was set against Fairport. The conversation
of clam-diggers, he said, did not appeal to him; and
he complained that at Fairport our only chance of
adventure would be my capsizing the catboat or robbing
a lobster-pot. He insisted we should go to the
mountains, where we would meet what he always calls
“our best people.” In September,
he explained, everybody goes to the mountains to recuperate
after the enervating atmosphere of the sea-shore.
To this I objected that the little sea air we had
inhaled at Mrs. Shaw’s basement dining-room
and in the subway need cause us no anxiety. And
so, along these lines, throughout the sleepless, sultry
nights of June, July, and August, we fought it out.
There was not a summer resort within five hundred
miles of New York City we did not consider. From
the information bureaus and passenger agents of every
railroad leaving New York, Kinney procured a library
of timetables, maps, folders, and pamphlets, illustrated
with the most attractive pictures of summer hotels,
golf links, tennis courts, and boat-houses. For
two months he carried on a correspondence with the
proprietors of these hotels; and in comparing the
different prices they asked him for suites of rooms
and sun parlors derived constant satisfaction.
“The Outlook House,” he would announce,
“wants twenty-four dollars a day for bedroom,
parlor, and private bath. While for the same accommodations
the Carteret Arms asks only twenty. But the Carteret
has no tennis court; and then again, the Outlook has
no garage, nor are dogs allowed in the bedrooms.”
As Kinney could not play lawn tennis, and as neither
of us owned an automobile or a dog, or twenty-four
dollars, these details to me seemed superfluous, but
there was no health in pointing that out to Kinney.
Because, as he himself says, he has so vivid an imagination
that what he lacks he can “make believe”
he has, and the pleasure of possession is his.
Kinney gives a great deal of thought to his clothes,
and the question of what he should wear on his vacation
was upon his mind. When I said I thought it was
nothing to worry about, he snorted indignantly. “You
wouldn’t!” he said. “If I’d
been brought up in a catboat, and had a tan like a
red Indian, and hair like a Broadway blonde, I wouldn’t
worry either. Mrs. Shaw says you look exactly
like a British peer in disguise.” I had
never seen a British peer, with or without his disguise,
and I admit I was interested.
“Why are the girls in this house,” demanded
Kinney, “always running to your room to borrow
matches? Because they admire your clothes?
If they’re crazy about clothes, why don’t
they come to me for matches?”
“You are always out at night,” I said.