more attention than what is necessary in order to understand
present duty, it would be foolish to make it a subject
of constant thought, and silly to make it a common
topic of conversation. It is a matter which should
be weighed deliberately and seriously by every young
person. It was ordained by the Lord at the creation,
as suited to the state of man as a social being, and
necessary to the design for which he was created.
There is a sweetness and comfort in the bosom of one’s
own family which can be enjoyed no where else.
In early life this is supplied by our youthful companions,
who feel in unison with us. But as a person who
remains single, advances in life, the friends of his
youth form new attachments, in which he is incapable
of participating. Their feelings undergo a change,
of which he knows nothing. He is gradually left
alone. No heart beats in unison with his own.
His social feelings wither for want of an object.
As he feels not in unison with those around him, his
habits also become peculiar, and perhaps repulsive,
so that his company is not desired; hence arises the
whimsical attachments of such persons to domestic
animals, or to other objects that can be enjoyed in
solitude. As the dreary winter of age advances,
the solitude of this condition becomes still more
chilling. Nothing but that sweet resignation
to the will of God, which religion gives, under all
circumstances, can render such a situation tolerable.
But religion does not annihilate the social affections;
it only regulates them. It is evident, then,
by a lawful and proper exercise of these affections,
both our happiness and usefulness may be greatly increased.
On the other hand, do not consider marriage as absolutely
essential. Although it is an ordinance of
God, yet he has not absolutely enjoined it upon all.
You may, therefore, be in the way of duty while
neglecting it. And the apostle Paul intimates
that there may be, with those who enter this state,
a greater tendency of heart toward earthly objects.
There is also an increase of care. “The
unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord,
that she may be holy, both in body and spirit; but
she that is married, careth for the things of the world,
how she may please her husband.” But much
more has been made of this than the apostle intended.
It has been greatly perverted and abused by the church
of Rome. It must be observed that, in the same
chapter, he advises that “every man have his
own wife and every woman her own husband.”
And, whatever may be our condition in life, if we seek
it with earnestness and perseverance, God will give
us grace sufficient for the day. But, he says,
though it is no sin to marry, nevertheless, “such
shall have trouble in the flesh.” It is
undoubtedly true that the enjoyments of conjugal life
have their corresponding difficulties and trials;
and if these are enhanced by an unhappy connection,
the situation is insufferable. For this reason,
I would have you avoid the conclusion that marriage