When we came out of the Presbytery again, it was raining in torrents, and my soul, too, was overcast with heavy clouds.  Papa did not know how to console me, but he promised, if I wished, to take me to Bayeux to see the Bishop, and to this I eagerly consented.

Many things happened, however, before we were able to go.  To all appearances my life seemed to continue as formerly.  I went on studying, and, what is more important, I went on growing in the love of God.  Now and then I experienced what were indeed raptures of love.

One evening, not knowing in what words to tell Our Lord how much I loved him, and how much I wished that He was served and honoured everywhere, I thought sorrowfully that from the depths of hell there does not go up to Him one single act of love.  Then, from my inmost heart, I cried out that I would gladly be cast into that place of torment and blasphemy so that He might be eternally loved even there.  This could not be for His Glory, since He only wishes our happiness, but love feels the need of saying foolish things.  If I spoke in this way, it was not that I did not long to go to Heaven, but for me Heaven was nothing else than Love, and in my ardour I felt that nothing could separate me from the Divine Being Who held me captive.

About this time Our Lord gave me the consolation of an intimate knowledge of the souls of children.  I gained it in this way.  During the illness of a poor woman, I interested myself in her two little girls, the elder of whom was not yet six.  It was a real pleasure to see how simply they believed all that I told them.  Baptism does indeed plant deeply in our souls the theological virtues, since from early childhood the hope of heavenly reward is strong enough to make us practise self-denial.  When I wanted my two little girls to be specially kind to one another, instead of promising them toys and sweets, I talked to them about the eternal recompense the Holy Child Jesus would give to good children.  The elder one, who was coming to the use of reason, used to look quite pleased and asked me charming questions about the little Jesus and His beautiful Heaven.  She promised me faithfully always to give in to her little sister, adding that all through her life she would never forget what I had taught her.  I used to compare these innocent souls to soft wax, ready to receive any impression—­evil, alas! as well as good, and I understood the words of Our Lord:  “It were better to be thrown into the sea than to scandalise one of these little ones."[12]

How many souls might attain to great sanctity if only they were directed aright from the first!  I know God has not need of anyone to help Him in His work of sanctification, but as He allows a clever gardener to cultivate rare and delicate plants, giving him the skill to accomplish it, while reserving to Himself the right of making them grow, so does He wish to be helped in the cultivation of souls.  What would happen if an ignorant gardener did not graft his trees in the right way? if he did not understand the nature of each, and wished, for instance, to make roses grow on peach trees?