“This toy,” she said, “excited my admiration, and I wondered what could provide so charming a phenomenon, when one day, after a lengthy examination, I found that it consisted simply of tiny bits of paper and cloth scattered inside.  A further examination revealed that there were three mirrors inside the tube, and the problem was solved.  It became for me the illustration of a great truth.

“So long as our actions, even the most trivial, remain within Love’s kaleidoscope, so long the Blessed Trinity, figured by the three mirrors, imparts to them a wonderful brightness and beauty.  The eye-piece is Jesus Christ, and He, looking from outside through Himself into the kaleidoscope, finds perfect all our works.  But, should we leave that ineffable abode of Love, He would see but the rags and chaff of unclean and worthless deeds.”

* * * * * *

I told Soeur Therese of the strange phenomena produced by magnetism on persons who surrender their will to the hypnotiser.  It seemed to interest her greatly, and next day she said to me:  “Your conversation yesterday did me so much good!  How I long to be hypnotised by Our Lord!  It was my waking thought, and verily it was sweet to surrender Him my will.  I want Him to take possession of my faculties in such wise that my acts may no more be mine, or human, but Divine—­inspired and guided by the Spirit of Love.”

* * * * * *

Before my profession I received through my saintly Novice-mistress a very special grace.  We had been washing all day.  I was worn-out with fatigue and harassed with spiritual worries.  That night, before meditation, I wanted to speak to her, but she dismissed me with the remark:  “That is the bell for meditation, and I have not time to console you; besides, I see plainly that it would be useless trouble.  For the present, God wishes you to suffer alone.”  I followed her to meditation so discouraged that, for the first time, I doubted of my vocation.  I should never be able to be a Carmelite.  The life was too hard.

I had been kneeling for some minutes, when all at once, in the midst of this interior struggle—­without having asked or even wished for peace—­ I felt a sudden and extraordinary change of soul.  I no longer knew myself.  My vocation appeared to me both lovely and lovable.  I saw the sweetness and priceless value of suffering.  All the privations and fatigues of the religious life appeared to me infinitely preferable to worldly pleasures, and I came away from my meditation completely transformed.

Next day I told my Mistress what had taken place, and, seeing she was deeply touched, I begged to know the reason.  “God is good,” she exclaimed.  “Last evening you inspired me with such profound pity that I prayed incessantly for you at the beginning of meditation.  I besought Our Lord to bring you comfort, to change your dispositions, and show you the value of suffering.  He has indeed heard my prayers.”