And to one of her missionary brothers she wrote: “What draws me to my Heavenly Home is the summons of my Lord, together with the hope that at length I shall love Him as my heart desires, and shall be able to make Him loved by a multitude of souls who will bless Him throughout eternity.”
And in another letter to China: “I trust fully that I shall not remain idle in Heaven; my desire is to continue my work for the Church and for souls. I ask this of God, and I am convinced He will hear my prayer. You see that if I quit the battle-field so soon, it is not from a selfish desire of repose. For a long time now, suffering has been my Heaven here upon earth, and I can hardly conceive how I shall become acclimatised to a land where joy is unmixed with sorrow. Jesus will certainly have to work a complete change in my soul—else I could never support the ecstasies of Paradise.”
It was quite true, suffering had become her Heaven upon earth—she welcomed it as we do happiness. “When I suffer much,” she would say, “when something painful or disagreeable happens to me, instead of a melancholy look, I answer by a smile. At first I did not always succeed, but now it has become a habit which I am glad to have acquired.”
A certain Sister entertained doubts concerning the patience of Therese. One day, during a visit, she remarked that the invalid’s face wore an expression of unearthly joy, and she sought to know the reason. “It is because the pain is so acute just now,” Therese replied; “I have always forced myself to love suffering and to give it a glad welcome.” “Why are you so bright this morning?” asked Mother Agnes of Jesus. “Because of two little crosses. Nothing gives me ‘little joys’ like ‘little crosses.’” And another time: “You have had many trials to-day?” “Yes, but I love them! . . . I love all the Good God sends me!” “Your sufferings are terrible!” “No—they are not terrible: can a little Victim of Love find anything terrible that is sent by her Spouse? Each moment He sends me what I am able to bear, and nothing more, and if He increase the pain, my strength is increased as well. But I could never ask for greater sufferings—I am too little a soul. They would then be of my own choice. I should have to bear them all without Him, and I have never been able to do anything when left to myself.”
Thus spoke that wise and prudent Virgin on her deathbed, and her lamp, filled to the brim with the oil of virtue, burned brightly to the end. If, as the Holy Spirit reminds us in the Book of Proverbs: "A man’s doctrine is proved by his patience,"[9] those who have heard her may well believe in her doctrine, for she has proved it by a patience no test could overcome.