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[Illustration:  THE PROBLEM.

POLAND (to Mr. LLOYD GEORGE, organizer of the Human Chess Tournament).  “HOW ARE YOU GOING TO PLAY THE GAME?  I WAS LED TO BELIEVE I WAS TO BE A QUEEN, BUT I FIND I’M ONLY A PAWN.”]

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ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

[Illustration:  GOING TO THE COUNTRY?

“I think it would be a calamity if we did anything to prevent the economic use of charabancs.”—­Sir ERIC GEDDES.

First “Banc." Mr. LLOYD GEORGE, Mr. BONAR LAW, Mr. BALFOUR, Mr. CHAMBERLAIN, Mr. CHURCHILL.

Second “Banc." Sir E. GEDDES, Mr. SHORTT, Mr. LONG, Sir ROBERT HORNE, Col.  AMERY.

Third “Banc." Mr. ILLINGWORTH, Lord E. TALBOT, Mr. FISHER, Dr. ADDISON, Sir GORDON HEWART.

Fourth “Banc." Mr. KELLAWAY, Sir M. BARLOW, Sir L. WORTHINGTON EVANS, Sir A.G.  BOSCAWEN, Mr. TOWYN JONES.

Fifth “Banc." Sir HAMAR GREENWOOD, Mr. BALDWIN, Sir JAMES CRAIG, Mr. DENIS HENRY, Mr. NEAL.

Sixth “Banc." Mr. MONTAGU, Dr. MACNAMARA, Mr. MCCURDY, Mr. IAN MACPHERSON, Sir A. MOND.]

Monday, August, 9th.—­In an atmosphere of appropriate gloom the House of Lords discussed the latest Coercion Bill for Ireland.  Even the LORD CHANCELLOR could say little more for the measure than that it might possibly enable some of the persons now in custody to be tried; and most of the other Peers who spoke seemed to think that it would be either mischievous or useless.  The only confident opinion expressed was that of the elderly Privy Councillor, who from the steps of the Throne ejaculated, “If you pass this Bill you may kill England, not Ireland.”  But despite this unconventional warning the Peers took the risk.

The event of the day in the House of Commons was Colonel WEDGWOOD’S tie.  Of ample dimensions and of an ultra-scarlet hue that even a London and South-Western Railway porter might envy, it dominated the proceedings throughout Question-time.  Beside it Mr. CLAUDE LOWTHER’S pink shirt paled its ineffectual fires.

When Viscount CURZON renewed his anti-charabancs campaign and Sir ERIC GEDDES was doing his best to maintain an even mind amid the contradictory suggestions showered upon him, the Ministerial eye was caught by the red gleam from Colonel WEDGWOOD’S shirt-front.  At once, the old railway instinct reasserted itself.  Recognizing the danger-signal and hastily cramming on his brakes, Sir ERIC observed that it would be “a great calamity” to prevent the economic use of the charabancs.

Tuesday, August 10th.—­As Lord Great Chamberlain, and therefore official custodian of the Palace of Westminster, Lord LINCOLNSHIRE mentioned with due solemnity the regrettable incident of the day before.  Lord CURZON thought the offender (the Right Hon. A. CARLISLE) should be allowed to explain his behaviour, and suggested that he should himself address to him a suitable letter.  Several noble lords—­anticipating, no doubt, that, whatever else came of it, the correspondence would furnish lively reading—­said “Hear, hear.”