my neighbours wife committed, but I must run away:
O harlot as she is, how hath she dishonoured her husband,
I sweare by the goddesse Ceres, that if I had [not]
seene it with mine eyes, I would never I have beleeved
it. His wife desirous to know the matter, desired
him to tell what she had done: then hee accorded
to the request of his wife, and ignorant of the estate
of his own house, declared the mischance of another.
You shall understand (quoth he) that the wife of the
Fuller my companion, who seemed to me a wise and chast
woman, regarding her own honesty and profit of her
house, was found this night with her knave. For
while we went to wash our hands, hee and she were
together: who being troubled with our presence
ran into a corner, and she thrust him into a mow made
with twigs, appoynted to lay on clothes to make them
white with the smoake of fume and brymstone. Then
she sate down with us at the table to colour the matter:
in the meant season the young man covered in the mow,
could not forbeare sneesing, by reason of the smoake
of the brymstone. The good man thinking it had
beene his wife that sneesed, cryed, Christ helpe.
But when he sneesed more, he suspected the matter,
and willing to know who it was, rose from the table,
and went to the mow, where hee found a young man welnigh
dead with smoke. When hee understood the whole
matter, he was so inflamed with anger that he called
for a sword to kill him, and undoubtedly he had killed
him, had I not restrained his violent hands from his
purpose, assuring him, that his enemy would dye with
the force of his brimstone, without the harme which
he should doe. Howbeit my words would not appease
his fury, but as necessity required he tooke the young
man well nigh choked, and carried him out at the doores.
In the meane season, I counsailed his wife to absent
her selfe at some of her Neighbours houses, till the
choller of her husband was pacified, lest he should
be moved against her, as he was against the young
man. And so being weary of their supper, I forthwith
returned home. When the Baker had told his tale,
his impudent wife began to curse and abhorre the wife
of the Fuller, and generally all other wives, which
abandon their bodies with any other then with their
owne Husbands, breaking the faith and bond of marriage,
whereby she said, they were worthy to be burned alive.
But knowing her owne guilty conscience and proper
whoredome, lest her lover should be hurt lying in
the bin, she willed her husband to goe to bed, but
he having eaten nothing, said that he would sup before
he went to rest: whereby shee was compelled to
maugre her eies, to set such things on the Table as
she had prepared for her lover.