* * * * *

LETTER 78.  TO MR. HARNESS.

     “St. James’s Street, Dec. 8. 1811.

“Behold a most formidable sheet, without gilt or black edging, and consequently very vulgar and indecorous, particularly to one of your precision; but this being Sunday, I can procure no better, and will atone for its length by not filling it.  Bland I have not seen since my last letter; but on Tuesday he dines with me, and will meet M * * e, the epitome of all that is exquisite in poetical or personal accomplishments.  How Bland has settled with Miller, I know not.  I have very little interest with either, and they must arrange their concerns according to their own gusto.  I have done my endeavours, at your request, to bring them together, and hope they may agree to their mutual advantage.

“Coleridge has been lecturing against Campbell.  Rogers was present, and from him I derive the information.  We are going to make a party to hear this Manichean of poesy.  Pole is to marry Miss Long, and will be a very miserable dog for all that.  The present ministers are to continue, and his Majesty does continue in the same state; so there’s folly and madness for you, both in a breath.

     “I never heard but of one man truly fortunate, and he was
     Beaumarchais, the author of Figaro, who buried two wives and gained
     three law-suits before he was thirty.

“And now, child, what art thou doing? Reading, I trust. I want to see you take a degree.  Remember, this is the most important period of your life; and don’t disappoint your papa and your aunt, and all your kin—­besides myself.  Don’t you know that all male children are begotten for the express purpose of being graduates? and that even I am an A.M., though how I became so, the Public Orator only can resolve.  Besides, you are to be a priest:  and to confute Sir William Drummond’s late book about the Bible, (printed, but not published,) and all other infidels whatever.  Now leave Master H.’s gig, and Master S.’s Sapphics, and become as immortal as Cambridge can make you.

“You see, Mio Carissimo, what a pestilent correspondent I am likely to become; but then you shall be as quiet at Newstead as you please, and I won’t disturb your studies as I do now.  When do you fix the day, that I may take you up according to contract?  Hodgson talks of making a third in our journey; but we can’t stow him, inside at least.  Positively you shall go with me as was agreed, and don’t let me have any of your politesse to H. on the occasion.  I shall manage to arrange for both with a little contrivance.  I wish H. was not quite so fat, and we should pack better.  You will want to know what I am doing—­chewing tobacco.

“You see nothing of my allies, Scrope Davies and Matthews[35]—­they don’t