Oh, how I wish your fists had!

Mer.

  Ego sum Sosia ille quem tu dudum esse aiebas mihi.

      I am that Sosia you claimed to be a while ago.

Sos.

  Obsecro ut per pacem liceat te alloqui, ut ne vapulem.

      For heaven’s sake, sir, let me have a word with you in peace
      without getting pummelled.

Mer.

  Immo indutiae parumper fiant, si quid vis loqui.

      No peace—­but I consent to a short armistice, if you have
      anything to say.

Sos.

  Non loquar nisi pace facta, quando pugnis plus vales. 390

      I won’t say it, not unless peace is made:  your fists are too
      much for me.

Mer.

  Dic si quid vis, non nocebo.

      Out with what you want:  I shall not hurt you!

Sos.

  Tuae fide credo?

      Can I take your word for that?

Mer.

  Meae.

      You can.

Sos.

  Quid si falles?

      What if you fool me?

Mer.

  Tum Mercurius Sosiae iratus siet.

      (solemnly) Then may Sosia feel the wrath of Mercury!

Sos.

  Animum advorte. nunc licet mihi libere quidvis loqui. 
  Amphitruonis ego sum servos Sosia.

      Listen here, sir.  Now I’m free to come out plain with
      anything.  I am Amphitryon’s Sosia, I am.

Mer.

  Etiam denuo?

      (advancing) What?  Again?

Sos.

  Pacem feci, foedus feci. vera dico.

      (vigorously) I made peace—­I struck a treaty!  It’s
      the truth.

Mer.

  Vapula.

      Be thrashed to you!

Sos.

  Ut libet quid tibi libet fac, quoniam pugnis plus vales;
  verum, utut es facturus, hoc quidem hercle haud reticebo tamen.

      Suit yourself, do what suits you, seeing your fists are too
      much for me. (doggedly) But just the same, no matter what
      you do, I won’t keep that back, by gad, not that.

Mer.

  Tu me vivos hodie numquam facies quin sim Sosia.

      You shall never live to make me anyone but Sosia, never.

Sos.

  Certe edepol tu me alienabis numquam quin noster siem;
  nec nobis praeter med alius quisquam est servos Sosia.[14] 400

      And by thunder, you shall never do me out of being our
      family’s servant.  No sir, and I’m the only servant Sosia we
      have.

Mer.

  Hic homo sanus non est.

      The man is crazy.

Sos.