that the milkman should howl?  In some parts of town milkwomen distribute their wares without howling.  They do, certainly, wear very short petticoats, but that is matter, as Aristotle says, for a separate disquisition.  On the other hand, milkwomen exist who howl as loudly as milkmen.  We cannot but fear that without these noises it would be difficult to attract the notice of servants.  If this pessimistic view be correct, sweeps and milkmen will howl while London is a city inhabited.  And even if we could secure the services of milkwomen of the silent species that ring the bell, could we hope to have female chimney-sweeps as well behaved?  Here, at all events, is a new opening for female labour.  When the milkman has done his worst, the watercress people come and mournfully ejaculate.  Now it is time for the sleepless and nervous to get up and do their work.  Now, too, the barrel-organ comes round.  There are persons who, fortunately for themselves, are so indifferent to music that they do not mind the barrel-organ.  It is neither better nor worse to them than the notes of Patti, and from the voice of that siren, as from all music, they withdraw their attention without difficulty.  But other persons cannot work while the dirty grinder and the women that drag his instrument are within hearing.  The barrel-organ, again, is strong in the support of servants, especially nurses, who find that the music diverts babies.  The rest of the day is made hideous by the awful notes of every species of unintelligible and uncalled for costermonger, from him who (apparently) bellows “Annie Erskine,” to her who cries, “All a-blowing and a-growing.”  There are miscreants who want to buy bones, to sell ferns, to sell images, wicker-chairs, and other inutilities, while last come the two men who howl in a discordant chorus, and attempt to dispose of the second edition of the evening paper, at ten o’clock at night.  At eleven all the neighbours turn out their dogs to bark, and the dogs waken the cats, which scream like demoniacs.  Then the public houses close, and the people who have been inebriated, if not cheered, stagger howling by.  Stragglers yell and swear, and use foul language till about four in the morning, without attracting the unfavourable notice of the police.  Two or three half drunken men and women bellow and blaspheme opposite the sufferer’s house for an hour at a time.  And then the chimneysweep renews his rounds, and the milkman follows him.

The screams of costermongers and of rowdies might surely be suppressed by the police.  A system of “local option” might be introduced.  In all decent quarters householders would vote against the licensed bellowings of cads and costermongers.  In districts which think a noise pleasant and lively the voting would go the other way.  People would know where they could be quiet, and where noise would reign.  Except Bologna, perhaps no town is so noisy as London; but then, compared with Bologna, London